Matt Colonel Offline Everyone at SHADO drinks coffee! Posts: 2391 Location: Coventry, RI FDK Need to Know Apr 5th, 2012 at 12:44am Print Post I've had this one in the back of my head for quite a while. Enjoy! What do you mean, we're out of coffee! WWW IP Logged
Librarian IAC Member Offline I may be blonde but... Posts: 657 Location: Washington (not DC) Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #1 - Apr 5th, 2012 at 11:51pm Print Post Something new! And it starts with a wedding. If you only have one solution to a problem - you're not trying. IP Logged
Neesierie Colonel Offline Straker, somehow it's always about you. Posts: 990 Location: Fulton, MO Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #2 - Apr 8th, 2012 at 4:57am Print Post A promising start, Matt! I see you're taking a leaf from my book and going to Westbrook Electronics. Have fun! The sky is not the limit; nor are the stars. WWW IP Logged
Matt Colonel Offline Everyone at SHADO drinks coffee! Posts: 2391 Location: Coventry, RI Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #3 - Apr 10th, 2012 at 2:58am Print Post What story did you mention Westbrook? I don't remember it, but then, again, it was more than five minutes ago. What do you mean, we're out of coffee! WWW IP Logged
Librarian IAC Member Offline I may be blonde but... Posts: 657 Location: Washington (not DC) Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #4 - Apr 22nd, 2012 at 10:48pm Print Post Ooh, another part. Off to read after a championship bout of killing moss on the patio. If you only have one solution to a problem - you're not trying. IP Logged
Neesierie Colonel Offline Straker, somehow it's always about you. Posts: 990 Location: Fulton, MO Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #5 - Apr 23rd, 2012 at 10:28pm Print Post It was one of my Chandra stories, "Noblest of All." Chandra's mom Rosetta Shakespeare met Straker while undercover at Westbrook for the Chronosian government. I enjoyed their first meeting in your story! However, I have a problem with one of your sentences. You wrote: "As he met her eyes with his, it was as if she could see to the depth of his soul." Who's point of view are you taking here, because you were with Straker, but the second half of the sentence seems to be from Ginny's POV. It's just too unclear with the wording. If you meant that Straker felt as though she could see into his soul, you might want to clarify that. It's a poignant moment and you don't want to spoil it with poor syntax. Just saying. No offense intended. You know me. I love a romantic moment! The sky is not the limit; nor are the stars. WWW IP Logged
Matt Colonel Offline Everyone at SHADO drinks coffee! Posts: 2391 Location: Coventry, RI Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #6 - Apr 23rd, 2012 at 11:30pm Print Post Neesierie wrote on Apr 23rd, 2012 at 10:28pm:It was one of my Chandra stories, "Noblest of All." Chandra's mom Rosetta Shakespeare met Straker while undercover at Westbrook for the Chronosian government. That's why I didn't remember it, I haven't read your Chandra series. (Shame on me. ) I fixed the passage, it now reads; "As he met her eyes with his, he felt as if she could see to the depth of his soul." I agree, it is a powerful moment, and I don't want the reader to be confused. Very good critique, no offense taken. Notice, I haven't clued the reader into Ginny's thoughts, that comes later. What do you mean, we're out of coffee! WWW IP Logged
Neesierie Colonel Offline Straker, somehow it's always about you. Posts: 990 Location: Fulton, MO Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #7 - Apr 25th, 2012 at 2:25am Print Post Oh, that's much better! Thanks! The sky is not the limit; nor are the stars. WWW IP Logged
Librarian IAC Member Offline I may be blonde but... Posts: 657 Location: Washington (not DC) Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #8 - May 4th, 2012 at 3:43am Print Post Ah, and she feels the connection to him. Excellent! If you only have one solution to a problem - you're not trying. IP Logged
Matt Colonel Offline Everyone at SHADO drinks coffee! Posts: 2391 Location: Coventry, RI Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #9 - May 26th, 2012 at 3:30pm Print Post The next bit is up, RL is still getting in the way. What do you mean, we're out of coffee! WWW IP Logged
Neesierie Colonel Offline Straker, somehow it's always about you. Posts: 990 Location: Fulton, MO Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #10 - May 29th, 2012 at 10:05pm Print Post For me too, Matt! Doesn't reality suck sometimes? The stress has got to let up sooner or later, though. (At least, that's what I keep telling myself!) The sky is not the limit; nor are the stars. WWW IP Logged
Matt Colonel Offline Everyone at SHADO drinks coffee! Posts: 2391 Location: Coventry, RI Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #11 - Jun 1st, 2012 at 4:33pm Print Post This too, will pass. What do you mean, we're out of coffee! WWW IP Logged
Matt Colonel Offline Everyone at SHADO drinks coffee! Posts: 2391 Location: Coventry, RI Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #12 - Jan 6th, 2013 at 7:54pm Print Post Going to try and finish this. Deb, could you turn on the light bulb for the story? I must have forgotten when I first posted it. Thanks. What do you mean, we're out of coffee! WWW IP Logged
Librarian IAC Member Offline I may be blonde but... Posts: 657 Location: Washington (not DC) Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #13 - Jan 7th, 2013 at 3:19pm Print Post Lightbulb on. And it's great to have you back on this story. (More secrets... whoo whoo! ) If you only have one solution to a problem - you're not trying. IP Logged
Neesierie Colonel Offline Straker, somehow it's always about you. Posts: 990 Location: Fulton, MO Re: FDK Need to Know Reply #14 - Jan 7th, 2013 at 8:36pm Print Post Nice new section, Matt! It's good to see someone writing! Maybe it'll help me to be motivated enough to finally figure out a way to get some time to myself so I can write!!!!!! The sky is not the limit; nor are the stars. WWW IP Logged
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FDK Need to Know (Read 8972 times)
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