SHADO
Welcome, Guest. Please Login or Register

News:
Page Index Toggle Pages: [1] 2  Add Poll Send Topic
Very Hot Topic (More than 25 Replies) FDK Kid's Stuff (Read 8341 times)
Matt
Colonel
*****
Offline


Everyone at SHADO drinks
coffee!

Posts: 2391
Location: Coventry, RI
FDK Kid's Stuff
Jun 12th, 2010 at 2:51pm
Print Post  
How do you do that? You know I'm hooked like a trout on a flyrod! Wink

Great start! Smiley
  

What do you mean, we're out of coffee!
Back to top
WWW  
IP Logged
 
Lightcudder
Colonel
*****
Offline


Trust no one.

Posts: 1311
Location: Here. When you least expect it
Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #1 - Jun 12th, 2010 at 2:52pm
Print Post  
Drat... I had actually thought of doing a story about John!!!!   This is great!
Is he dreaming...Nah... what is going on!! Shocked
  

I need some air.
Back to top
WWW  
IP Logged
 
dragon
Ex Member


Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #2 - Jun 13th, 2010 at 2:54am
Print Post  
Oh, my. This is going to be difficult ...
  
Back to top
 
IP Logged
 
Matt
Colonel
*****
Offline


Everyone at SHADO drinks
coffee!

Posts: 2391
Location: Coventry, RI
Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #3 - Jun 13th, 2010 at 2:56am
Print Post  
I'm liking this, and who is in Ginny's past? Inquiring minds want to know!  Smiley
  

What do you mean, we're out of coffee!
Back to top
WWW  
IP Logged
 
Neesierie
Ex Member


Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #4 - Jun 13th, 2010 at 3:41am
Print Post  
Did you notice that you're in this story?  Hope you don't mind!  Wink  I thought you might get a kick out of it.  If you object, I'll change it of course.  I'm adaptable.  But Straker counts on your help, so you may want to stick around.  Wink
  
Back to top
 
IP Logged
 
Matt
Colonel
*****
Offline


Everyone at SHADO drinks
coffee!

Posts: 2391
Location: Coventry, RI
Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #5 - Jun 13th, 2010 at 3:47am
Print Post  
I just read that part, leave me in there by all means! Smiley And Ginny with her little baby, how sweet! (Matt wipes a tear away) Cry

Good job! Smiley
  

What do you mean, we're out of coffee!
Back to top
WWW  
IP Logged
 
Lightcudder
Colonel
*****
Offline


Trust no one.

Posts: 1311
Location: Here. When you least expect it
Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #6 - Jun 13th, 2010 at 3:04pm
Print Post  
Wonderful story as always Denise. Glad it 's not just children who have died.. that would have been too sad..
But I love the way Ed is coping.I don't think  I would have managed as well as he is doing.   

And Ginny .. beautiful Cry
Looking forward to reading more... as always! Smiley
  

I need some air.
Back to top
WWW  
IP Logged
 
Matt
Colonel
*****
Offline


Everyone at SHADO drinks
coffee!

Posts: 2391
Location: Coventry, RI
Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #7 - Jun 13th, 2010 at 10:53pm
Print Post  
Just read the next part, leave it to the greenies to spoil a party. Wink

I forgot to mention, Ed's comment to Ginny in the last part was very sweet! Smiley
  

What do you mean, we're out of coffee!
Back to top
WWW  
IP Logged
 
Neesierie
Ex Member


Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #8 - Jun 14th, 2010 at 12:07am
Print Post  
Yeah.  He sounds mellower all of a sudden, doesn't he?  But then, I guess getting to see your dead son again could do that to you!  (At least, I think it would.  If it didn't, maybe there would be something wrong with you!)  Cool
  
Back to top
 
IP Logged
 
Lightcudder
Colonel
*****
Offline


Trust no one.

Posts: 1311
Location: Here. When you least expect it
Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #9 - Jun 14th, 2010 at 7:48am
Print Post  
Kids Stuff
1.
I thought Ed was dreaming at the beginning, as he did, and you kept us thinking that until  - was abruptly awake -
He knows that it wouldn't be his son, but stillwants to treat himself to the pleasure of spending time with John, instead of doing as he should and calling security... not very sensible Ed, but we'll forgive you!.
And then the  mystery continues with Ford's call!

2
A lovely scene with children in the Control room... are the children in 'control'? Is that the aim of this? to have the children affect the staff so much that they can no longer operate effectively? Will Ed be able to cope with losing John again? will he have to make another life-or-death decision about the  children?

3
Virginia... that was so sad and Ed's reaction was perfect.  Cry
and White's 'the small of them reminds me of my daughter' ( the crayons) absolutely spot on. there are so many smells thatremind me of when my children were little (Infacare babybath for one!) and wax crayons have a unique smell of their own.
And then there is the revelation that these are lost children. but they have been found - will they have to lose them again?
This is going to be sad..... Undecided
Straker felt bereft.... - but he knows that it is not his son.. How can you stay so calm Ed!! and he has a responsibility to the base.. Question of Priorities again??  Getting worried here!

4
Lunch in the cafeteria.... I can imagine it!! Grin
But duty calls.....
The art of the bluff... I wouldn't want Jackson involved in this either! Angry
'These few hours may be all we'll get'     I love the way Ed has accepted this. (although I hate the phrase 'quality time'.. I think he might have just said 'time'... all time spent with these children will be precious)
I really can't see this ending happily....... Huh

But I'm desperate to read the next part!
  

I need some air.
Back to top
WWW  
IP Logged
 
Neesierie
Ex Member


Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #10 - Jun 14th, 2010 at 7:51am
Print Post  
Your wish is my command.  The next chapter is up!  Cool
  
Back to top
 
IP Logged
 
Lightcudder
Colonel
*****
Offline


Trust no one.

Posts: 1311
Location: Here. When you least expect it
Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #11 - Jun 14th, 2010 at 8:24am
Print Post  
I know. ! Smiley
Chapter 3

'The gifts from the past' this is the first hint that they are more than just illusion, that there may be something good about all this. Ayshea;'My mind doesbn't really have much of a chance to express its concerns, because my heart is so happy... wonderful Smiley
and the thought that any price was worth these hours...

The chess game;  lovely, but with a further hint that all is not as it seems. and maybe there is going to be a happy ending after all!
'Wouldn't that be a better example of my being the best?'  On my... where is this leading?

I love the confrontation with Henderson and Straker's continued bluff. He has changed his mind from the beginning of the story, duty no longer calls. and he accepts that security will be coming, in the morning.
Then the question of what those who set this scenario up, wanted?
I love the thought of him watching his son sleeping.
ANd Virginia's comment; 'I never got chance to say good bye to her before.' Hmmm ........thinking here now!  Wink

ANd we end with Straker doing everything possible to protect them, surrounded by his staff
(Ayshea.... holding his hand  Cry)

And they stood there, protecting the children.... Shocked

Fabulous
  

I need some air.
Back to top
WWW  
IP Logged
 
Neesierie
Ex Member


Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #12 - Jun 14th, 2010 at 12:55pm
Print Post  
So glad you're liking it!  This story soooo went places I never thought it would go!   Shocked  At times, it was like it was writing itself!  And it certainly didn't have the ending I had planned!!!  Oh, my!  Shocked  I'll put up more later today when I have time.  Thanks for reading!  Grin
  
Back to top
 
IP Logged
 
Matt
Colonel
*****
Offline


Everyone at SHADO drinks
coffee!

Posts: 2391
Location: Coventry, RI
Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #13 - Jun 14th, 2010 at 1:02pm
Print Post  
This is outstanding Denise, once again I find myself on the edge of my seat! Smiley

Oh by the way, I'm taking vicious notes on Ginny being a Mom for use later! Wink

  

What do you mean, we're out of coffee!
Back to top
WWW  
IP Logged
 
Neesierie
Ex Member


Re: FDK Kid's Stuff
Reply #14 - Jun 14th, 2010 at 1:15pm
Print Post  
Matt,
It was so fun to write her that way!  I liked her much better when she had Shanna in her arms!  Wink
  
Back to top
 
IP Logged
 
Page Index Toggle Pages: [1] 2 
Add Poll Send Topic
Bookmarks: del.icio.us Digg Facebook Google Google+ LinkedIn reddit StumbleUpon Twitter Yahoo