COLD
by Amelia L. Rodgers ©2000 all rights reserved
Not meant to infringe on the copyright of UFO Adult language and content (sequel to my story Most Unhappy Returns)
Not to be used without author's permission.
E mail author

This story is as always dedicated to Mr. Ed Bishop, and we all know Gerry Anderson is right when he calls Ed "one of the most talented people he's ever worked with" Ed is an exceptionally great actor, and man.
This story is also dedicated to someone named Yuchy and someone named Julie and someone named Carly, all three brightened my day by sending me gifts when I least expected it, and most needed it. You are all special people and I'm proud to call you friends, even though distance separates us.
And how could I overlook the wonderful Commander Edward Straker, who took the time, albeit reluctantly, to share his life experiences with me once more, so that I could put them in story form. (He totally denies the grass scene, though) (g)

you think i'd leave your side baby
you know me better than that
you think id leave you down when you're down on your knees
i wouldn't do that
i'll tell you you're right when you want
and if only you could see into me
ha ah ah ah ah ah

oh when you're COLD
i'll be there
hold you tight to me
when you're low
i'll be there
by your side baby
 (partial lyrics of By Your Side sung by SADE (adu/hale/matthewman/denman)
                                                        http://www.sadeonline.com/sade/

Not a ghost of a chance of deliverance. He might as well face it. October was here. That meant a bunch of the most irritating, most appalling, utterly repulsive directors were going to nvade his precious privacy soon. Just burst in past his beloved Miss Ealand, and cause a scene hat had more dramatics than there was on all the celluloid that Harlington-Straker Studios had hot in a year. They were going to complain to him about the sound track, about the budget, about the film crew, about the blueberry crumpets and tea served at breaktimes, right down to fighting over the shade of face powder. Complain about the lack of proper security.

Good God, now anyone in their right mind couldn't possibly allow even the slightest detail about what the new film was going to be like slip out. So I have to prevent those horrid Internet people from finding out plot details. Not enough security. Get more security.

Then there were the ones that bled verbally in his office about too much security. Why on earth had he come up with the idea of being a film mogul as cover? Couldn't they have hid Shado under some place more pleasant? More quiet? With no actors, no film crew, no dollies, no smiling starlets with more silicone in their body than you'd find back in the States in those garish colored computers named after fruit?

Starlets here. Starlets there. Starlets which hung all over him, their motives about as subtle as a shark in a goldfish bowl. God have mercy. Yes, October was here.

The truth was, Ed Straker had a real humdinger of a migraine. Perhaps more accurately, he thought to himself, it had him. The possibility of having his head simply severed from his neck was beginning to have appeal. The painkillers he had taken that morning had been about as effective as using a mouse trap to catch a elephant. New wonder drug, ha! Plus his arm still hurt. Hurt was putting it mildly. Expect some damage, they'd said. Expect some weakness and pain. Nobody had warned him it was often going to feel like someone was holding a blowtorch to his forearm. Tests. And more tests. And still more tests. Be patient. Don't worry. Rest. Don't stress out. Yeah, don't stress out. The fact that aliens are hunting for human organs like women seeking bargains at a yard sale is nothing to stress about, Straker. Why don't I just break into a couple of verses of don't worry, be happy? And I feel hot, why do I constantly feel hot?

I hate Mondays.

Ed got out of his car, and instantly froze. The Burberry trench he'd been wearing was as protective as if he'd been wearing a piece of onionskin paper. Practically no better than wearing nothing to be warm in the relentless cold weather. He fished desperately for an handkerchief in his pocket. His nose was running like it was trying to compete in a track meet. Gosh, and now I'm dying of the flu too.

I can see it now. National Geographic magazine cover. Film mogul discovered on lot in block of ice. Preserved body. Scientists have come to the conclusion he is distantly related to some caveman. God. Discovering the wheel and fighting dinosaurs is looking better and better to me. Better fighting off creatures with a twig and a sharp pointy rock than facing the day.

God. I hate Mondays.

Ed entered the office.

"Good morning, Sir."

God. I hate you, Miss Ealand. How long has it been? Ten years? Twenty years? The value of pi? How is it you can always look so fresh at nine forty in the am, while I look like I was hit by a lorry, and feel three times worst? Head's pounding, sinus is in overdrive, body hurts. They put animals down for less than this. Why am I so hot?

However, all Ed said in a tragic tone was, "Good morning, Miss Ealand."

It came out rather like "Gud moourening, Dis Eeand."

"Oh dear, Sir, sounds like you're coming down with a cold."

Yes, Miss Ealand. Such wonderful powers of observation is why you qualified to work for this top secret organization, Ed thought.

However, all Ed did as a reply was enter his office, wait until she stabbed the control to shut the doors and lock them behind him. He fell into his chair, picked up the cigarette box.

"Straker."

It came out as "Ayker."

Voice Print Identification Positive. Commander Straker.

No, damn it to hell. I'm not. I'm one of the starlets. I have a 38 inch bustline that matches my IQ. I don't have to work, I don't know what work means. Damn technology, fails when you don't want it to, and works like a charm when you do. I hate my job.

The lift began to plummet. Ed managed to rise. So did his bile. He hung up his coat.

Ohhhhhhh my headddddd, ohhh my stomach. That's it, I'm about to toss my cookies. That'll look good on my health report. Commander Straker vomits all over his office. Oh yes, yes, that will be thrilling. Why did I talk them into getting me out of hospital early? Why? WHY? Wonder if someone took my room? Wonder if that damn nurse ever warmed that bedpan? Wonder if that magazine from the year 1810 is still in the lobby?

Ed waited until the office stopped, and his vital organs had at least partially lined up where the anatomy books said they should be, and plastered on his most intimidating, cold, calculating, commanding, icy look. The doors opened. Hellish torture in the form of a Australian stood there. Facing a thousand aliens armed solely with chewing gum and a clothes hanger would have been more desirable.

"Hi Ed, aren't you a little late?" Alec Freeman offered with a grin. Yes, his so-called beloved Miss Ealand had opened her oh so carefully pastel lipsticked mouth, and blabbed that the Commander was dying to Alec.

Let's see. Decapitation. Nah, messy. Never cared for all that blood, myself. Electric shock? Yes, has promise. When you're going to kill your second-in-command and best friend, mode of death isn't a choice you should make without giving it deep thought. Deep. That's it. Throw Alec and Ealand aboard the sub, attach a torpedo, yes, I'm beginning to feel better already just plotting his murder. Put Henderson down there too. Three vultures with one stone. Efficient. Save the damn commission money, Straker. Isn't that what the General always says? Bless his microscopic poor substitute for an heart. Makes Hitler look like Tinkerbelle.

You've been a thorn in my side, Straker. Thank you, bless you, kind General Sir. I sure hope so, you mammoth wildebeest. I'd like to be the whole blasted rosebush!

"Shouldn't you be working, Colonel?" Ed finally demanded.

It came out as "Shydunt u bee wurking, Kuernel?"

Alec looked down at the floor as though his liquor supply depended on it. What he actually was doing was trying to keep from laughing.

"Ed?"

"Yus Uhec?"

Ed sneezed. The handkerchief came out again. The aquiline nose disappeared into it. Ed gave a honk that would make a goose adopt him plus lay a Faberge egg.

Alec chewed on his lower lip. No, he would not laugh. Be tough, Freeman, he told himself.

"Go home, Ed. You look and sound miserable. Come on, I can cover for you. Go home, go settle down in bed, get some sleep."

Sleep. Quiet, restful sleep. Oblivion. No starlets. No uncomfortable tuxedos. No opening night parties. No popping flashbulbs in his eyes to qualify him for being the fourth blind mouse. No starlets looking at him with less compassion than a Mrs. Praying Mantis about to dine on Mr. Mantis.

"Ur yu suure?"

"Suure ahm suure, Ed." Alec lost it. He laughed.

Ed Straker's mouth pulled into the thin line of distaste his friend knew so well. His hands balled into fists. And now live on BBC Television, Shado Commander loses it. Tears out friend's heart. Fed-Exes it to aliens. Film at eleven.

"Ven I weecuver, isle geht vu fur this, Uhec." However, there was a sliver of amusement in Ed's bloodshot, ice-blue eyes. Ed did a neat about face, almost to some cadence only he heard, worthy of the Air Force brigadier general he was, and entered the lift again. The doors shut and the lift rose up. Alec watched him go with worry etched on the craggy face.

Corpses resembled beauty queens, compared to how awful Ed looked.

Alec frowned. It was indicative of how sick Ed was that he hadn't even bothered fighting him. For a second Alec wondered if he should have insisted Ed have someone drive him home, but he figured no, that would be insulting Ed further. With the decision of having Ford watch the GPS on Ed's car to make sure the Shado commander got home safely to his lover and fiancée Lily Marsh, Alec went toward the control room, somewhat reassured.

"Lily, do you think you could bring..what is it?" Ed said from his position on the long white leather couch. He had taken his pillow and fur throw, and stretched out comfortably with a tray with a pitcher of juice, a cup and his tissues besides him on a small table. He practically blended in with the couch, he was so pale. His arm throbbed a little.

It was later in the day, and the antihistamines and various potions Ed had picked up earlier at the chemist had done wonders for his distinctive voice and diction. He had even had some hours of sleep. Lily had just burst into the flat after coming home from Black Oak Retirement Home where she worked as a activity director. She threw off a coat and her macrame bag. She looked beat.

"Edward, I must tell you something." Marsh announced gravely.

Ed's heartbeat had been plodding along quietly. Now it suddenly leapt and broken into a run like a rabbit attempting to escape a lioness. A four letter word came into Ed's mind.

Baby?

He and Lily had not that long ago lost a baby daughter, and Lily had not brought up having another child. As a matter of fact, she had not even slept with him that much since he had been released prematurely from Mayland hospital at his insistence. Not that he was all that concerned over it, she needed to recover, and the final test results on his injured shoulder hadn't come in yet, so he himself had been less than amorous. Their love making was cautious, slow, not up to Lily's and his usual standards. Ed had to admit, he was still in mourning for little Flora. His perfect little girl.

"What, flower?" Ed smiled hopefully, propped himself up a little higher on the pillows, drew the throw closer around him. He reached for the cup of juice.

"I am going away for good. I am leaving you, my Edward." Lily said matter of factly.

The cup of juice fell from his suddenly numb fingers, and the grape juice splattered him and dripped to the ground. Ed looked as if he'd been struck by Rutland's bullet again.

He tried to form words. Words didn't come. Blood thundered in his head.

"I cannot take the way all those women are around you. Do you think I do not know what they are thinking? Do you think I do not know they would like to bed you? I am a daughter of the Goddess, a witch, I know these things."

"Lil--" Ed cleared his throat, stammered again. "Lily, we have a wedding scheduled in one month. Invitations have been sent, I've reserved a leave of absence, Angel's cleared a date for the services, I-I-"

"I cannot live with wondering when you will give in to temptation. I cannot live with you going off at strange times, not telling me where you are going, saying only I must trust you, hearing Alec say I must trust you. I will not be a compliant housewife in her lace apron, pushing a mop. I do not want children running around, I do not want to be tied down."

"What happened to love? What happened to trust? What happened to the feelings we had for each other? My God, Lily, this is insane, I'm the head of a studio, they make films there, I have certain responsibilities, I have to deal with those actresses, I have to show up at those--"

"You. It is always YOU. What you will do. What you must do. FUCK! I have had it, Edward. You have too many needs, and I do not know who I am anymore. Do not misunderstand, these months together, seeing you again, remembering the first sight of you have been happy. We can be friends, isn't that right? But you and I, it is hopeless, Edward. I am a witch, I know these things."

Ed cast aside the throw that by then was soaked with juice, and jumped up.

"Damn you, NO! You can't just, I can't believe, how dare you! I'll tell you what's hopeless! Being so damn self-centered that you didn't care about my feelings or the welfare of our unborn baby daughter! I'm beginning to think witch is a description that suits you very well!"

He regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth. Far too late.

Lily Marsh stepped up and slapped Ed across the face hard, then stepped back, grabbed her purse and coat, went to the door. Ed actually rocked on his stocking feet by the force of the blow. His face stung. Desperation hit him harder than she had, squeezed hope and life out of him.

"My God, wait, no, I don't know what I'm saying, I've felt like hell, overworked, forgive me, Lily, for the love of God, don't. Let's talk this ov-"

"I do not believe in your God. I will have someone come by later for the rest of my things. Goodbye, my Edward. I hope someday you find the obedient, compliant little baby-making wife that you need. I am sorry, I truly am. "

The door slammed shut behind her.

Ed stood there for several seconds. Vaguely it registered that she was gone.

The silence was broken by someone's heart rending cry of no, and he hardly knew his own voice and then Ed dropped back on the couch, seeing nothing, feeling nothing, hearing nothing, again alone. Commander Straker, the professional. The rock. The calculating head of Shado. The man of ice.

Utterly heartbroken.

Alone.

Deserted.

Cold walls closing in on him. Swallowing him.

--I never want to see you again--

Oh please it can't happen, can't be happening again. I can't take it again.

Without quite knowing what he was doing, in shock, Ed reached for a coat, and went out the door.

It had not occurred to him that he was still merely dressed in pajamas and socks, and England on that day was as cold as a killer's heart.

I hate Mondays. I hate them with a passion. I hate them. Not even lunchtime, and all I have so far is paperwork. This isn't what I broke my butt to do. Damn it, I'm bored. What strange impulse made me agree to come back and spend one underpaid year in this damn cold country full of stupid accents, and crumpet eating tea drinkers? Nobody ever has nervous breakdowns here. How's a girl supposed to earn her fizzy soda pop money? Arrrrggggggh.

The phone rang and she grabbed it.

"Fielding."

"Come down to ICU, Fielding, we have something interesting for you."

"Gotcha!" She hung up. Hoo boy, probably a plague victim, that's the most excited I've ever heard that guy get.

Dr. Margaret Fielding, known as "Mags" to her friends, bounded down the hall in her yellow clogs, getting quite a few looks from the people she passed. She jumped into the ridiculously small elevator, jabbed the seven button, and hummed to herself. Yippee, finally a case I can get my teeth into!

She walked into ICU, rubbed her hands together, gave the doctor a big smile, looked briefly down at the patient, then back up again at the doctor, and started to say something. Then she looked at the patient. And looked at the patient. And looked at the patient.

God almighty, he was gorgeous. He had the usual tubes in him, he appeared febrile, the doctor was saying something to her about "was found on the M-4, wandering around, by some luck an off-duty ambulance saw him and brought him in" but by God he was gorgeous. She tried to tear her eyes off him and listen to what the doctor was saying.

"Fever, confusion, indications of recent surgery, shock, you name it, he has it, massive infection, almost lost him due to a reaction to a antibiotic we gave him, seems to be doing better on another one. No alcohol in system, no recreational drugs in system. Look at this MRI study in his chart."

"Jessssssssssus." Mags said, flipping through the chart. "Guy's full of lead. Reconstructed left shoulder, tissue damage. Massive infection. Why did you call me in?"

"Instinct. Won't talk to us. Won't give us his name. Won't cooperate. You have a reputation for loosening tongues, healing hearts and souls and you're our American psychiatrist on staff. Let me know how you do, Fielding." The doctor smiled at her and left. He likes me, he really likes me, Mags thought with a mental grin.

Mags pulled up a chair. The sound made the patient open his eyes. Gulp, she thought, he has frosty blue eyes you could get lost in. Okay Mags. Professional. Stay professional. Son of a bitch, he's gorgeous. Guard your heart.

"Hi! I'm Dr. Margaret Fielding, and you are..?"

"Get lost."

Jesus, he has a sexy voice to go with the body and face. Danger, danger, Will Robinson.

"Get lost? Boy, you must have been teased horribly as a kid with a name like that." Mags grinned.

The frosty blue eyes showed surprise, and then a trace of amusement.

"You're American." he said, studying her.

"Yeppers. Well, transplanted, anyway. Born here. Grew up in San Francisco. You sound American too."

"Boston."

"Oooooh. Boston. Rich and spoiled I bet."

"I'll confess to the rich. Not sure about the spoiled. What did you say your name was?"

"Dr. Margaret Fielding. Mags for short. Call me Mags. Is your name really Get lost?"

"Edward," he said wearily. "Ed."

"So Ed," Mags said, flipping the pages of his chart, "Do you wander the major roads of the United Kingdom in your pajamas often?"

"Everyone has to have a hobby," Ed muttered.

Shit, he has a sense of humor, too. I think I'm in love.

"Try stamps or matchbooks next time. Less dangerous."

"What hospital is this?"

"Cullenbart Hospital. What's this surgery you had recently? You have enough lead in you to keep me in no. 2 pencils for life. Did anyone tell you you have massive nerve damage?" She caught the wince. Silently he turned his head away from her. "How did you get shot?"

"None of your business. Bring me a phone."

Different tone, she thought, the sound of a man you don't say no to. Authority figure. Hmm, lots of scars, wonder if he's some kind of military bigwig?

"I can call anybody you want me to call. You just rest and let me do it. Who do you need?"

"Freeman, Alec Freeman. Damn. Number, I can't recall the number." He moaned a little, started to get agitated. She pushed her chair a little closer to the bed.

"It'll come back to you. You have a high fever, want me to-"

He began to sob. Gently she reached over and took his hand. He closed his fingers over hers tightly.

Damn, Mags thought. This one's a keeper. Guard your heart.

"YOU DID WHAT?" Alec practically screamed at Lily Marsh.

"You have no right to speak to me like that!"

"I have EVERY fucking right to speak to you in any way I want! Ed's gone missing. If anything happens to him I swear to God I'll break you in two. Do you have any idea how sick he is?"

"I did not make him go! "

"You let him walk out of here in the state he was in? I ought to--"

"Alec," Frances said softly.

"We'll find him, Alec. We'll find him if we have to search every inch of English soil to do it," Angel said. Frances nodded firmly. Frances had never seen Angel so angry. Surprisingly, she was more than a little angry herself. She and her husband, the Right Reverend Stanley "Angel" Brisby, had befriended Edward, and he had grown close to them, as if they were his father and mother. There was more than a little of the lost sheep in Edward, and Frances had sometimes privately wondered if Lily was suitable for him. Her reluctance to talk about the death of her baby daughter, the growing nervousness about the upcoming wedding, her confessions that she was beginning to feel trapped, hemmed in. All of it had spelled trouble. Frances' repeated warnings to Edward had been treated with ridicule.

"All brides to be get cold feet," Ed had smiled, "I'm more than a little nervous about marrying again myself, you know."

"Has she talked to you about it?"

"No, no but that's girl stuff. I'm glad she's been able to talk to you. I wish she'd talked about Flora. She didn't come with me to the grave, and well, that..listen, these lemon muffins are delicious. I'm marrying the wrong girl. I should be stealing you away from Angel!"

Frances laughed, but she had heard his unspoken phrase. That hurts me. Frances knew he had been mourning his little girl. He hid it well, but he was a deeply sensitive man. And he hadn't talked about losing either his son, or his little girl. She had only learned about his son from Lily mentioning it. Frances looked up. Angel was grabbing his car keys, and Lily had stormed out, tearful, and Alec looked like he was well on his way to having a stroke.

Frances got her cashmere cardigan, and followed Alec and Angel out. She had a unsettling thought. What if Lily leaving had been the last straw? Edward had been so on edge, learning that Flora had died, and had left hospital against all their advice not to do so. She hardly saw Edward as a man who gave up easily, but even he had a breaking point. Frances sighed.

Ed Straker laid back against the pillows, staring at the IV bag which led down to the tube in his hand. His supper laid on the tray beside him, uneaten. He looked away from the bag, and down at his arm. He could remember getting the first typed letter from Dr. Shroeder, and crumbling it after he read it, and watching it be vapourised.

....possible loss of sensation in the left arm, rendering it useless, suspected nerve damage due to repeated injury of the left shoulder and arm..recommended retirement for medical reasons...

How much time do I have, I wonder? Before my world comes to a end? Before Henderson sees that report and seizes the opportunity to throw me out of Shado? How much longer? What in God's name is left now? No job. Crippled arm. No wife.

Ed sighed.

Why in blazes did I ever think I could have a normal life like any other man, anyway? Oh stop feeling sorry for yourself, Straker.

The door opened a little.

"Alec?" Ed said hopefully, eagerly.

Mags came in, carrying a paper bag.

"Hi, how are you feeling?" Mags watched his shoulders sag a little.

"Better," Ed said without enthusiasm.

"You could at least pretend to be glad to see me, Ed." Mags said with a grin.

"What are you doing back? I thought your shift was over."

Mags picked up the tray and peered at it. She wrinkled her nose, put it down.

"Hospital food sucks no matter what country you're in. But don't worry, I got you something edible. Burger and fries."

"Thank you, I'm not hungry."

"Ed, don't make me shove this down your throat."

"Listen, I wanted to apologise for this afternoon, pretty disgraceful for me to go and lose it the way I did. Burden you with my problems."

"I'm a psychiatrist, Ed, if people don't burden me with their problems I don't get to eat. Now come on, just one bite. Here, smell. Oooh, yummy!"

"You're a psychiatrist? You didn't tell me you were a psychiatrist," Ed said in irritation as she sat beside him.

"Yes I did, Ed." she grinned. "Here, smell. Yummy."

"No thanks."

"Ed, I personally slaved all day over a hot stove to cook this for you."

Ed looked at her inquiringly. She shrugged.

"Okay, so I got it at McDonalds."

Ed chuckled. He smiled at her. Be still my aching heart, Mags thought.

"You have a beautiful smile."

"Do I? Can't say anyone's said that to me before," Ed confessed.

"You work with a bunch of blind people?" Mags said.

Ed chuckled. Then his smile faded.

"I am sorry, I talked too much this afternoon. I promised myself I wouldn't be upset over my daughter dying and my fiancee leaving and probably losing my job," he said with an ironic laugh. Mags ignored it.

"Are you always that hard on yourself? You were having normal, natural emotions of grieving."

"Now I know you're a psychiatrist," Ed said to her.

"Was it showing? The psych speak? Damn, and I promised myself it wouldn't come out," Mags snapped her fingers.

"Thank you, for this afternoon, I needed someone to talk to. When do I get out of here?"

The door opened, and a nurse stuck her head in.

"Can I see you for a second, Dr. Fielding?"

Mags nodded.

"See Ed? They can't run this hospital without me! Try and get some sleep, okay, Ed?"

Ed smiled at her, nodded slightly, closed his eyes. Reluctantly Mags went out.

"What do you want? I'm not even on duty, you know."

"It has to do with that fellow you had me phone. That Freeman? I finally got a hold of him. He's in the waiting room downstairs. With a bunch of people."

"Shit shit shit. Okay, thanks for letting me know. I'll handle it."

Mags ignored the nurse's frown at her choice of language, and got into the elevator again. When she got to the first floor, she saw a tall pockmarked man, a bear of a man, pacing. Next to him, pacing along, wearing a clerical collar, was a stout man in his sixties, accompanied by a petite woman in a tweed skirt, red twinset, and pearls, frowning delicately as she watched the men. Mags put on her best professional air.

"Mr. Freeman?" she announced brightly. It took all of her training not to step back in sheer terror as he practically jumped on her.

"Thank God! How is Ed, doctor? Where is he? He'll want to see me. I'm Freeman."

"He isn't in any shape to see anyone. He's had a shock. He's still under treatment."

Alec drew out a wallet and flashed a ID at her.

"My credentials will....."

"Look, I don't care if you're the Sultan of Brunei! Ed needs to rest. And I need to talk to you. Ed only mentioned a Alec Freeman, who are they?" Mags pointed accusingly at the others.

"I'm Reverend Brisby and this is my wife Frances. Believe me, Miss, we have Edward's best interests at heart. We've come to think of him as a son. Will he recover?"

"Look why don't we all go for coffee? Then we'll exchange information."

"But is Edward going to be all right?" the woman said nervously.

"That might depend on all of you. He'll need all the support he can get. Come on, the cafeteria's open all the time."

"I only was with him for about two hours, but my guess is clinical depression brought on by the loss of his daughter, and made worst because of his medical condition. Then to top it all off, his fiancee walks out on him. When they found him, he was pretty much out of it. High fever. Dehydrated. Bruised, our guess is he fell a couple times. Shock. Confusion. Dr. Ritter who runs the casuality unit here is a good sort, he asked me to come, had a hunch Ed needed someone to talk to. Did you know he was suffering from some sort of nerve damage? He undoubtedly has been having a lot of pain and keeping it to himself," Mags was saying. She opened another package of sugar and sprinkled it into her coffee absently, which had long since gotten cold.

"Damn it." Alec swore underneath his breath. "I should never have let that damn idiot out of hospital. I should have hired a whole army to guard his door and not let him check out of there. Fool idiot never tells me a thing. Friends for twenty years plus and he never tells me a thing. Damn his eyes anyway."

"You're the first person he asked for. That says a lot. He spoke of you quite a bit. Said he wouldn't have made it through the funeral for his daughter if you hadn't been sitting next to him."

"He said that? To you? A perfect stranger?" Alec scoffed nervously.

"It's often easier to talk to perfect strangers then to people you love. And he holds a powerful affection for you, Mr. Freeman. And you for him."

Freeman wriggled uncomfortably in his seat. Mags grinned.

"Two of a kind. Men!"

"What?"

"Uncomfortable with deep emotions," Mags said. The woman, Frances, had been listening somberly to everything, but now she chuckled, and nodded. Angel flashed her a smile.

"How bad is his arm?" Alec said, partially to take attention away from the truth of Mags' words.

"Bad enough. Isn't my department, but the arm could eventually be completely paralysed. It looked on the X-ray and the MRI scan like he has injured the shoulder and arm area repeatedly. Some of the sutures had gotten infected. Ed allergic to antibiotics?"

"Yes. Christ, don't tell me.."

"Well the doctors didn't have much choice. He was admitted with a 103 fever from the massive infection, and they had to use a general antibiotic, fortunately Dr. Thomas was on duty and was able to save him when he went into convulsions from the allergic reaction. They tried some drug that is relatively new, and kept a close watch on him. It worked, thank the stars. Listen, I wanted to ask you about this fiancee of his. What kind of nutcase is she?"

Angel looked at her strangely.

"Whatever do you mean, Doctor?" the cleric asked.

"Call me Mags. I mean who in their right mind would leave Ed when he was so ill and depressed to begin with? What sort of witch is this broad anyway?"

Alec grinned for the first time.

"A real one. A literal witch."

"You're pulling my leg!" Mags exclaimed. Alec shook his head, and related the tale of Ed helping out Petunia, an old woman who had eventually died, and left Ed a small amount of money and a wishing fairy, and of how Ed had been killed and come back to life right before Alec's eyes. He talked about how Lily Marsh had gotten involved with Ed, later helped him face his experiences as a prisoner of war in Vietnam, and of how that had led to meeting Angel, who had escaped and saved his life, and Frances, Angel's wife.

"She just is afraid of settling down. She's a good person at heart, really," Frances sighed.

"No so-called good person would leave a man like Ed alone," Mags said fiercely. All three looked at her in a peculiar manner. Oh oh, Mags thought. How do I get out of this one? "That is to say, anyone with common sense would wait until Ed was well, or at least tell Ed gently that the relationship was over." Mags said quickly. Frances was looking at her thoughtfully.

"I know, dear. I know." Frances nodded. Then Frances glanced down at Mags' left hand, which bore no jewelry. No wedding ring. "Are you married, dear? You seem to have a lot of common sense about such things," Frances said in what she hoped was a casual throwaway fashion. Alec grinned at her. Angel examined the ceiling.

Mags quickly grabbed still another packet of sugar and dumped the contents into her cold coffee. "Uh, no, I'm not married, never met the right person. Listen, if you promise not to disturb him, we can go sneak a look at Ed upstairs. I was meaning to leave a note to the doctor on call to write up an order for a light sedative so Ed would sleep soundly."

"Sounds good." Alec nodded. Mags took a quick sip of her coffee, made a face, shoved it away from her and got up. Behind her back, Angel grinned at Frances and shook his head and rolled his eyes at her. Frances shrugged.

They followed Mags to the ICU unit desk.

Mags hunted for Ed's chart.

"Where's the chart on the John Doe in room six?"

"The man they admitted this morning? He checked out."

"WHAT?" Mags, Alec, Angel and Frances all yelled.

The nurse frowned at them.

"This is an ICU, please keep quiet."

"You birdbrain! You let him check out?" Mags snapped.

"I had no authority to keep him here or to let him go. He asked for a doctor to sign the AMA slip, the doctor signed it, I lent him cab fare, he left."

"Son of a bitch! Son of a bitch! Alec, where would he go?" Mags yelled at Alec.

"Probably the studio, but he'd need to go home and change first. Come on, I'll drive!"

Alec went through several red traffic lights, and both Mags and Frances shut their eyes tight when he turned some corners like a race car driver, flooring the petrol pedal of the battered Brisby station wagon. On the other hand, Angel seemed to be enjoying the speed. It didn't take Alec long to get to Ed's flat. A pounding at the door produced nothing for a moment. Just as Alec was about to pull out his own key to Ed's flat, the door opened.

Ed peered out, blinked.

"What on earth?"

Alec pushed past Ed to get into the flat, stared at him. Ed scowled.

"Do come in, make yourself comfortable," Ed snapped. Mags inspected him, grinned. He fastened the sash of his silk robe around his waist, he'd still been in his pajamas. "Oh, I see you brought everyone with you."

"Ed, what am I going to do with you?" Alec yelled.

Ed ignored Alec and plopped down on his black couch. Mags started looking around the flat. She raised an eyebrow at a collection of flintlock pistols on the wall.

"Edward, you gave us all such a fright," Frances scolded. Ed sighed.

"I'm all right, Frances, really I am. Can I get you some coffee?"

"I can get it." Frances smiled, bent, and kissed Ed on the cheek. Ed smiled slightly at her. He exchanged a look with Angel. The reverend sat down next to Ed, grinned.

"You know, son, you have more lives than a cat." Angel patted Ed on the hand once. Ed leaned back wearily.

"I suppose so. How did you all find me so quickly? And what are you doing here, Fielding?"

"Call me Mags, I told you! Ed, don't you have a CD player? I've never seen anyone who still had records." she admitted, amused. "Hmmm, classical, jazz, standards. Not much of a collection."

Ed shrugged, watching Alec pace up and down across the floor.

"Let me guess, you found out about Lily. When I got here from hospital, the rest of her things were gone. Telephone service at her house was disconnected. I called Black Oak, she turned in her notice this morning. Got to hand it to Marsh, she's fast," Ed said bitterly.

"I think I'll lend Frances a hand with the coffee." Angel said, and got up, patted Ed's shoulder, and vanished into the kitchen. Mags came over to sit where Angel had been.

"Ed, you should let us take you back to the hospital." Mags said quietly.

Ed shook his head firmly.

His telephone rang, and he reached over and picked it up.

"Straker. Ah. It's you. Yes. Yes. You do know I won't stand for this, right? I won't give up easily you know. I can't just throw away twenty years..Yes, I saw Shroeder's report. I still can read, you know. Ah, am I? I see. I won't let you do this. You can't do this. Yes, I understand that. Hello? Hello?" Ed sighed, and hung up.

"Well, he didn't waste any time, did he? I'm officially fired."

"What the hell are you talking about, Ed? Who was that?" demanded Alec in mid-stride.

"Henderson. He just fired me. Foster assumes my job at the studio first thing tomorrow morning. I've been formally retired. Medical grounds."

"Fuck!" exclaimed Alec. He knew Ed meant Shado.

"Good word, that. Fuck. Appropriate," Ed raised his fingers and pinched his nose, in pain. "You know something? I think I'm tired. I think I'll go to bed. That way I'll be up bright and early to get my gold watch and my last cheque."

"The injury can't be that bad, all you need is.."

"No, Alec, I've known for a long time now. It's all over. I'm finished. Done. Arm's getting worst. I can't do my job without two good arms. I can't go on swallowing the pain pills they prescribed for me. I can't take the pain anymore. I can hardly see straight. And you know what else, Alec? I'm tired. I'm really tired. And I don't think I give a damn anymore. About anything. About anyone. Good night."

Alec opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. He walked at Ed's side until the Shado commander reached his bed and got into it. Then he covered him gently with the fur throw, which had dried, but was stained and matted with the juice. Ed fell asleep almost instantly. He walked into the living room. Frances and Angel stood there, horror on their faces. It was clear that they'd overheard.

"Somebody better stay with him. If ever I've heard despair in a voice," Mags muttered. She shook her head. It was all beginning to seem unreal to her. One second she had never heard of a Ed Straker, and the next she was sitting in his living room, impossibly mixed up in his life. So much for the rule about never getting personally involved with a patient...

"Can that bastard Henderson do it, Alec?" Angel said.

"I'm afraid so. And aside of killing him, which believe me, I'd love to do, I can't stop him. Damn. I hoped this day would never come, for Ed's sake."

"Certainly there are other things Ed can do, Alec. Jobs in which a weak arm wouldn't matter." Frances protested.

"Ed's arm doesn't matter in his present job, Frances. It's just that Henderson is using that as a excuse to throw him out."

"Can I do anything?" Mags said.

Alec shook his head.

"Look, will you three stay with Ed, make sure he doesn't fly off somewhere again? I want to talk to Paul Foster, see if I can't delay things until I can come up with a plan."

"Count on it." Angel said.

"Of course," Frances said.

"I'll stay as long as you need." Mags said.

Alec smiled at them. Then he went out.

"Does Ed have a deck of cards anywhere? Looks like it's going to be a long night," Mags commented.

Several hours later, Ed got up and went into the living room. Angel was sleeping curled up on Frances' lap, and Frances was sleeping as well. Fielding was curled up on the black couch. Ed looked at Angel and Frances for a long time, then smiled. Then he returned to the bedroom. His Glock was loaded and on the side table. A note in his handwriting lay next to it. It was addressed to Alec. Ed picked it up to read it again.

'Alec, there are no words for how much I have treasured our friendship, and neither of us are men which can speak freely about the deepest of feelings. However, I need to try and let you know how much you have meant to me. If I had ever had a brother, I could ask for no finer person to be my brother than you. There is no easy way to say adieu, but I beg you not to grieve for me, or to think ill of me because of the solution I chose. I don't know if I believe in a God at this point. If there is a God, then perhaps he will let me see Johnny for at least a little while, and Flora, before I go to whatever fate lies ahead. I would like to be buried at Arlington, for no man loved the service more than me, and no man sacrificed more than I did to keep the enemy at bay. I always tried to wear my stars proudly. Don't weep for me, Alec. Please don't weep for me.

Paul Foster is a fine person, I'm confident he'll do a superb job. I know serving under him will be difficult, but the 'studio' needs you, Alec. And so does Foster. Help him however you can, won't you? And let him know I was behind him 100%.

Give my regards to Virginia, to Peter, to Nina, and to Gay. Joan, too. I know Miss Ealand will take my loss hard. Please convey to her my deepest affection, and say that I ask her to try and understand. I just simply couldn't live with the pain. Look after Mary and Lily for me, let Lily know I bore her no ill, I have no regrets. My time with her was short, but happy.

Please give my thanks to Dr. Fielding. She was as kind to me as she is beautiful, at a time when I truly needed someone to talk to.

I know it will be difficult for Angel and Frances. Tell them to pray for my soul, and tell Frances that the closest I ever got to heaven on earth was her lemon muffins, so I know what to expect if I run into Saint Peter.

Tell Dr. Jackson that in my last moments, I was amazingly calm. Without fear. And don't worry, Alec. I am sure it won't hurt. You, of all people, should know what a good shot I am. My will is in the safe, you know where it is.

Farewell, Alec. Try and be brave, for me, will you?
Affectionately,
Ed'

Ed nodded, refolded the note and set it back on the nightstand. Then he slipped the Glock into the pocket of his coat, and left the bedroom, opened the front door, and went out of the flat, closing the door quietly behind him. Ed looked at the sky. It was going to be a glorious day.

It was Angel who shifted position, and woke up first. He looked around the room. Frances yawned, and Mags shot up unexpectedly, knocking the rest of playing cards to the floor. It took her a full minute to remember what had happened. There was a distinct sense of unreality, as she struggled to recall the events of the previous hours. Besides, she had gone and had that stupid nightmare again. About her mother, and the day that her mother had --

The sound was unmistakable. The loud single crack of a bullet. Margaret Fielding screamed. Stanley Brisby turned white, and crossed himself, and Frances stared. Mags jumped up, ran into the bedroom. She didn't even bother to check the note. She ran out of the bedroom and yelled at the top of her lungs.

"STRAKKKKKKERRRRRRRRR!!!! You son of a bitch!!!! STRAKERRRRRR!!!"

Mags practically pulled the door off the hinges, propelled out by some sick impulse, even though she knew what she would see, the same thing she had seen when she was a young girl and had come home from school to find blood everywhere. The suicide of her mother. The kind of scene that burned into your conscience, changed you, twisted your insides, the kind of scene that suddenly made your sunny, safe life look like a trap full of barbed wire. The kind of scene that turned your whole world around, and made you choose to spend the rest of your life exploring the human mind. First her mother. Now Ed Straker.

I can't look, what kind of fucking psychiatrist am I? I should have known! All the signs were there! It's not like I haven't lost patients before. What was it my professor in college said? You're not God, Margaret, you can't be with them 24/7. In the end they are the masters of their fate, even though they may not know it. Some will slip through your fingers, Margaret. The way your mother did.

I can't look at the carnage, I want to remember him the way I first saw him, the way his silver hair curled gently inward at the nape, the light, soft tuft of hair on his chest, the way I had to tear my eyes away from the ugly scarring that dissected his shoulder, the way his perfect mouth curved so slightly into a smile, like the thinnest of crescents. The enormous frosty blue eyes with their nearly transparent fringe of lashes. Eyes with such sadness it was enough to break your heart. The amazing structure of his face, like he'd been carved from a solitary, perfect hunk of marble. The way he studied me, the way he'd burst into sobs from grief that too seldom saw the light of day. The frail, long, soft fingers that curled so hungrily over mine, as if he was starved for something as basic and as vital as the touch of another human being. Such a beautiful soul, such a beautiful man. Gone now. Gone now because he couldn't deal anymore with the crap life handed him. Gone now because the pain of losing a child and shortly after that, his lover, had come too close together. Gone because he couldn't face the idea of being weak and frail and dependent on anyone. Gone because some bastard she had never laid eyes on, some Henderson, had taken away the last thing he'd been hanging onto, his job. Gone now because some absolute asshole of a woman hadn't wanted him. What kind of people were they? How blind could fools be?

Margaret started crying as she moved as far away from the flat as she could get. Any minute now, she'd see the blood..

"Fielding," the voice said gently, wearily, so wearily.

Oh shit, oh son of a bitch, now I'm hallucinating, now I'm hearing his voice.

"Fielding, I heard a scream. Was it you?"

He was standing in front of her.

But he couldn't be standing in front of her.

Was he standing in front of her?

She reached out and grabbed his hand and pinched him.

"YEOW!" came the response. He pulled his hand away and rubbed it, frowning at her.

She poked him in the chest. Several times. He made no attempt to stop it.

She shook him. Hard. Suddenly he pitched forward and she had to grab him fast, hold him against her. He was shaking. She started shaking. They both sat down on an expanse of grass.

"I couldn't..."

"You sorry excuse for a man! You fucking, disgusting, sorry son of a bitch! Don't you ever even think of doing that again, you bastard!" she yelled at him.

"I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it."

"YOU FLAKE!!" Vaguely Mags realised that her reactions weren't the greatest balm for a man who just had come close to killing himself, but she kept yelling.

"I just couldn't do it. Oh Fielding, what the blazes am I going to do? For the first time in my life, I don't know what to do." Tears were streaming down his cheeks.

"You supreme IDIOT!"

"Stop it! Oh forget it." Ed made an attempt to get up. He sighed.

"IDIOT!" She pulled him down.

"Stop it." Ed said. "It isn't helping, calling me names." He brushed his tears away roughly.

She stared at him.

He stared at her.

A grin had appeared out of nowhere on her face.

Ed stared at her, perplexed. Clearly trying to ascertain if his near suicide had snapped whatever remained of her sanity.

Her grip on him tightened, son of a bitch, he's skin and bones under the silk robe, Mags realised, and then she pulled him forward, raised her hand up, tilted his head slightly, and locked her mouth over his, and kissed him hard. For several seconds he might have well been a rock. He didn't react. Mags didn't care much. She kissed him more softly. She leaned back and away a little to gauge his reaction. His eyes closed slightly, those pale lashes came down in a soft arc, fluttered. His body became limp against hers, compliant. She kissed those soft, velvety lips, her hands came down to untie the sash, slipped underneath the pajama top, glided along his chest, and he made a satisfied sound deep in his throat, and he started to kiss her back. Suddenly his lips seemed to be all over her at once, one hand cupped over one of her breasts, lifting and struggling to pull off her stiff brassiere under the cotton top she was wearing. With his other hand he pulled at her buttons.

And then they stopped.

And stared at each other.

"I uh.."

"No..I ..uh.."

"I'm sorry." Mags said.

"Don't be."

They stared at one another.

"That's funny."

"What is?"

"I never realised how beautiful you are until I wrote the note." Ed pushed aside a unruly wisp of her short blue-black hair thoughtfully. "YEOW! Why are you hitting me?"

"You bastard! You fool idiot!" Mags yelled at him again. Then it occurred to her he'd said she was beautiful. She blinked.

Ed sighed.

A low chuckle came from somewhere near them.

Ed and Mags looked for the source.

Stanley and Frances stood there.

"Oh Goddddddd. How long have you two been standing there?" Ed demanded, turning beet red.

"Long enough. Here it is three months away from your wedding and you're sitting on your front lawn about to strip down to your God-given skin and have sex with a stranger for all the world to see. Have you no shame, Edward?" Stanley said, with a relieved grin the size of London.

Frances giggled, then cried, then it changed into a giggle again.

"Everyone has to have a hobby." Ed muttered. Mags dissolved into hysterical giggles and Ed watched her calmly as she rocked with laughter, a thin smile growing on his face.

"You'll never get the grass stains off that beautiful robe, Edward." Frances said, chuckling. "And thank God, he saw fit to stop you from making the worst mistake of your life."

"It wasn't God that put down my automatic, it was me. Where's Alec? Help me get up, will you? I feel weak."

"I'm so sticking your skinny ass into the hospital, Ed!" Mags said to him, helping him rise. She could feel him shaking. He was leaning heavily against her.

"I have other plans. I have a man named James Henderson I need to see. And a gold watch to pick up. Stanley, my Glock is around here somewhere, will you bring it in for me, thanks. Someone tear up that note, and burn it for me. Then, Fielding, you can stick my skinny ass into hospital," Ed sighed. "Incidentally, was it you I heard scream, Fielding?"

"Damn it, stop calling me Fielding! My name is Mags!"

"I don't like Mags. I'll call you Maggie. Suits you. Good strong lungs you have there, Maggie."

"I hate Maggie."

"Margo?"

Mags made a face.

"Good strong lungs."

Then, just for her ears, he whispered something. "Rest of you isn't half bad either, Fielding."

She grinned at him, and pushed back stray strands of his hair fondly.

Mags invaded Ed's kitchen, and together with Frances made everyone breakfast, while Angel helped Ed get dressed after his shower. Ed now found the simple act of getting dressed painful, so Angel's assistance was welcome.

"Gosh, Angel. I hope my business suit is appropriate for the last day of work. I bought this over twenty years ago, thought it suited a movie mogul. Do I look all right?"

Angel grinned, and sat on the edge of Ed's bed.

"In all the years I've been in the military, son, I've never seen a man who made a uniform look as good as you do. You have nothing to worry about, Ed. And don't give me that crap about movie mogul."

Ed held out his arm and Angel fastened Ed's Certina wristwatch on Ed's wrist.

"What do you mean?" Ed said, puzzled.

"I know you're involved in something else. Something big. Now look, I know not to stick my nose in it. But I know you, Ed. The service is in your blood. You wouldn't give it up unless they'd handed you something big. I know you have connections, it doesn't take much to see that. You're involved in something top secret. I don't have to know what it is, I don't want to know what it is. But just don't try to con a con man, son."

Ed sat next to Angel. Ed smiled impishly.

"I'm glad I found you again, Stanley. I'm going to need you. I don't know what lies ahead for me. I pretty nearly..well. You know." Ed's voice sounded deeply ashamed. Angel shook his head, reached up and put a hand on Ed's shoulder gently.

"Come on, Ed. We need to go rescue that Fielding of yours. Frances will by now know every single detail of her life. You know, Frances is going to try and get you two together. She's probably driving Fielding crazy by now."

"Christ. I've just totally screwed up one relationship. I don't want to screw up another." Ed moaned, exasperated. Angel chuckled.

"Pretty late for that, from what I saw out there on the grass." Angel gently nudged Ed on the elbow teasingly. Ed gave a long sigh.

"I don't know what I was thinking. Right out there in the open like that. With a woman I hardly knew. It just, well, it just seemed right somehow. I'd looked into the maw of death, I wanted a taste of life for a change. I think Maggie did, too." Ed looked thoughtful.

"You know, son, I still have that date reserved. Would seem a pity to waste that morning coat you ordered. Somebody should march down the aisle and into your arms in November." Angel commented.

"Are you insane? I hardly know Fielding!" Ed gestured wildly.

"Sure, son. That's why you've already decided to call her Maggie." Angel got up and went into the living room. Ed stared at his back, then muttered to himself, irritated. He jumped up and followed him.

"Did you notice how skinny he is? Poor man doesn't have anyone to cook for him. So busy with that studio of his. Such an attractive man, don't you think, Mags?" Frances was saying, pouring juice.

"Lordy. Boy he must have had the females all over him like flies on honey. Why a man who is as much as a hottie as he is, has all these problems with women is beyond me. I just don't get this Lily dame! If I was one month away from marrying him, I'd be clinging to his ankle, howling at the moon and watching the calendar."

"A hottie?" Ed said from behind Mags.

She grinned up at him. Then she saw the suit he had on.

"Well, not in that ugly suit. What blind person sold you that thing?"

"What's wrong with my suit?" Ed said, offended.

"How much did you pay for that piece of trash?"

"Who told you you can criticise my wardrobe? What is it about women? Why is it they think they know everything about clothes?" muttered Ed. Frances smiled at him.

"Because we do, dear. Now sit down and have some breakfast."

Ed rolled his eyes, but he sat down.

"You cook any of this, Maggie?"

"Do you have to call me that? Call me Mags, I said! And no, but I buttered the toast!" Mags announced in mock pride.

"Mags sounds like a name for a poodle, or something." Ed grinned at her.

She leaned forward, and for his ears alone whispered to him.

"Is that why we nearly had sex on your front lawn like a couple of dogs in heat?"

Ed stared down at his plate intensely, not saying a word. Mags grinned, thinking Straker 0, Mags 10. There was a knock at the door.

"I'll get it." Angel said, picking up Ed's Glock, which he'd set on top of a shelf near the doorway. The door opened, and Alec stood there. Angel smiled, put it back.

"Henderson wants to see you. Now." Alec said to Ed.

"Henderson can wait. I'm having breakfast. I don't pass up Frances' French toast for anybody. I wouldn't pass up Frances' French toast for God incarnate."

"Edward, that isn't very Christian." Frances scolded. Alec smiled at her.

"Ed's soul has been condemned for a long, long time."

"I love you too, Alec. Come have some coffee."

"You're really pushing the envelope today, huh?" Alec asked Ed. He looked at the Glock for a moment and didn't say anything.

"I'm going to go in there, and get my gold watch and last pay cheque and then I'm going to tell Henderson he can go stick his head in his nether regions," Ed said, without mirth. He picked up his fork, cut a piece of toast, but merely twirled the fork thoughtfully.

"Edward," Frances scolded, hiding a smile.

"You didn't have anything to do with that ugly suit he's wearing, did you?" Mags asked Alec. They looked at one another. How is he? Alec wondered with his eyes. Mags gave the slightest worried shake of her head in reply. Alec frowned, then smiled.

"He made that monumental mistake that all on his own."

"Okay, okay, that's it, I'll change, I'll change." Ed dropped the fork, rose and went into his bedroom, opened his wardrobe door, grabbed his cream Nehru suit and went into the bathroom with it.

"Alec, he.." Mags began.

"He wrote a suicide note, Alec. Took his gun and went out when we were all sleeping," Angel said quietly. "But God takes care of his children, he couldn't do it."

"Holy Christ." Alec said softly, pained. "Where's the note?"

"Made us burn it. Didn't want you to see it. But it was addressed to you."

"Keep him occupied when he gets back in. I have something I need to check out. Don't let him know you told me."

"Stanley, better go lend him a hand if he's changing," Frances reminded him.

Angel nodded, got up again.

"What shape is he really in?" Alec asked Mags.

"He made the choice to live, Alec. That says a lot. He's got a long hard climb in front of him though. Want to know what's funny? I don't even know his fiancee or this freak Henderson guy, but I hate their freaking guts."

Alec grinned at Mags.

"Doesn't sound like the objective opinion of a professional, Dr. Fielding."

"Screw objective. Screw professional. Screw my well-paying job. I'm going to hang around until I know he's okay. " Mags folded her arms.

"You sound like a woman in love," pointed out Alec.

"Horse piss! I hardly know him. Besides I don't believe in love at first sight. And second, that Lily person will come to her senses sooner or later and show up." Mags took a bite of her French toast after drowning it in syrup. She looked miserable. She hoped it didn't show.

"Oh dearest, love at first sight is real. I should know, it happened to me with Stanley." smiled Frances. Angel smiled at her lovingly.

"Okay so maybe." Mags shrugged. "But stuff like that never happens to me." Mags pushed her soggy French toast around on the plate moodily.

"Stuff like what?" Ed wanted to know as he entered the living room and sat down at the table.

"Oh holy mama!" Mags exclaimed, seeing Ed in the form fitting creme jumpsuit.

"Huh?" Ed asked.

"You, dummy!" Mags said, all but drooling.

"Me what?" Ed said, hanging his jacket on the back of his chair carefully.

"Frances, does he know at all how gorgeous he is?" Mags asked.

Frances smiled. "Doesn't have a clue, dear."

"That ugly mug? Are you kidding," Alec said. "Be right back, got to use the loo."

Ed chuckled at Alec, stirred sugar into his coffee, studying Mags.

"Well, you should know where it is by now," Ed said to Alec.

Alec went into the bedroom, closed the door beside him slightly, opened the drawer of the night table and carefully took out the writing pad, holding it by the edges, and Ed's pencil. He inspected the top sheet carefully, nodded, and began to trace over the indentations that the pressure of Ed's handwriting had left with the side of the pencil lead. The contents of the note could now be seen perfectly. Bad tradecraft, Ed, the Australian thought. Or maybe in your emotional turmoil you just forgot to make sure you didn't leave any trace behind. Alec read the note. He read it a second time. Then he carefully replaced the pad and pencil back where they belonged, his eyes stinging with tears. He made his way to the bathroom, splashed water on his face, took a deep breath and joined the others.

"You ready, Alec? I guess it's time to face the music," Ed said when Alec came in.

"I have the feeling things won't turn out as bad as you expect, Ed," Alec said enigmatically.

Ed swallowed a final bite of French toast, dabbed at his lip with the orange napkin.

"Breakfast was great as usual, Frances. Angel, would you mind if I stole Frances from you?"

"I'd break both your skinny kneecaps, son," Angel said calmly. Frances giggled and Ed grinned widely. Alec laughed along with Mags.

"Aren't you supposed to turn your other cheek or something as a Reverend?" asked Ed innocently.

"There's that commandment about not coveting thy neighbour's wife, Ed," Angel grinned. "Especially if thy neighbour can break your kneecaps."

"Details, details. I'm sure if Moses tasted Frances' cooking, he'd ask Jehovah to make an exception to the tenth commandment," Ed declared. Angel chuckled at him.

"Maggie, you want to join me at the studio? I suppose you're going to stick my skinny ass in hospital later anyway."

"Try and stop me, Straker. Especially with the way you look in that jumpsuit."

Ed smiled at her.

"Always bolster the patient's ego, Fielding. Bet that's the first thing they taught you in shrink school."

"Shut up, Ed. Hey, do I really get to see your studio?" Mags said, trying to sound excited.

"Sure. Tomorrow it won't be mine, so we'll make a day of it," Ed shrugged, grabbed his jacket. "You drive, Alec, we'll take Angel's car. That way you can all watch me become unemployed."

Mags heard the hurt, fear and bitterness in his voice and sighed.

"Colonel Foster, you tell Commander Straker that if he thinks this little waiting game of his is going to change anything, he can forget it. He isn't capable of running SHADO and he knows it, and this medical report, signed by Dr. Shroeder, proves it." Henderson slammed the medical report down on Ed's desk.

"I'm confident Commander Straker is on his way in, General. Colonel Freeman went to get him," Paul said. Paul was seated in Ed's chair, tapping his fingers on a UFO report. He looked down at his wristwatch.

Ed was late.

Very late.

Miss Ealand had called Paul to tell him that Ed was on his way down, but there was no sign of him yet.

Finally the door opened.

"General! What a nice surprise," Ed said. Alec was behind him, scowled at Henderson and leaned against the wall, Paul got out of Ed's seat, and Ed sat down in it, picked up his paperweight and examined it, then looked at a file. "Why, what do we have here? Is that my medical report? All one hundred and twenty-three pages of it? Impressive, impressive."

"Straker, you've been found to be mentally and physically incapable of continuing your job. I'm hereby relieving you of command and retiring you early. Colonel Foster, as of today, you are Commander of SHADO. Your first responsibility is to get a security team to take Straker to the medical centre and make sure Dr. Jackson administers the amnesia drug to Colonel Straker."

Ed's mouth opened in shock, but no words came. Alec stared in disbelief.

"That isn't necessary. I'll go by myself," Ed finally said in a dead tone.

"That's ridiculous General! Ed is not a security risk and what's more, you know it. I won't stand for this!" Alec said angrily, banged his fist down on the desk, and moved in front of Henderson menacingly. Ed shook his head slowly at Alec. Henderson ignored Alec.

"You have your orders, Colonel Foster."

"I heard them," Paul said.

"Well, don't just stand there! Get security in here!" Henderson bellowed.

Paul smiled.

"No."

"WHAT?"

"Oh sorry. No, sir," Paul said calmly.

Ed looked at Paul, smiled.

"Paul, no. I appreciate it, believe me but no."

"Sir, General Henderson just stripped you of rank and position. So right now until you're reinstated as the head of SHADO, I don't have to take orders from you, Ed."

"Wha-what?" Ed stammered.

Alec grinned at Paul.

"I'll have you court martialed for this, Foster!"

"Paul, don't do this.." pleaded Ed.

"Ed, you're a civilian now. Shut up," Alec said with delight. He bent over and thumbed the control for the door. Ed, still reeling, looked with confusion as Virginia Lake, Peter Carlin, Miss Ealand, Gay Ellis, Mark Bradley, Keith Ford, Ayshea, Nina Barry, and Joan Harrington came into the room.

"What the devil is going on here, Straker?" Henderson yelled.

"I've been chosen as spokesperson for the group, General," Virginia Lake said quietly. Ed stared at her.

"You're supposed to be on Moonbase duty. You, Gay, Nina, all of you, what are you doing here?" Ed stammered.

"General, I speak for everyone gathered here. We resign from SHADO effective today," Virginia said.

"My God," Ed said, practically in a whisper. He blinked hard to keep from breaking into tears.

"Why you..well, fine! I'll accept your resignations. I'll get replacements!"

"From where, Henderson? The local employment office? Put a help wanted ad in the Times? If you'll come with me, you'll find out that 100% of SHADO H.Q. personnel will walk out if you don't reinstate Ed as Commander. That will leave Earth defenseless," Alec reminded him.

"Alec! You can't do this! All of you! You can't do this!" Ed shouted, trembling. The doors opened again and Dr. Doug Jackson came in.

"Jackson, have all these people gone mad?" Henderson yelled. He looked like he'd popped two arteries and was well on his way to popping a third.

"You are asking me for a clinical diagnosis, General?" Jackson hissed in his European accent. He looked faintly amused.

"Yes, damn it, if that's what it takes."

"I am sorry to say that I am not on duty. One cannot continue one's job as SHADO analyst if there are no more SHADO personnel to analyse. But if I may offer a personal opinion, I would say that these people are demonstrating their loyalty to Commander Straker in a rather unusual way. Solidarity, if you will. A massive walkout, the brainchild of Colonel Freeman. My advice to you would be to make Colonel Straker the commander again, and then I will write my recommendation he go on a medical leave. That will temporarily leave Colonel Foster in his place until the Commander can be treated for his condition."

Ed finally smiled. Then he swerved in his chair, looked at General Henderson squarely in the eyes, and waited, frosty blue eyes like steel, triumphant. Made a steeple of his laced fingers. The Straker they were all familiar with.

"General, ball's in your court," Ed said calmly.

"Damn you Straker! You won this one, but you haven't won the war!"

"So is Ed Commander of Shado?" Alec said, with a grin a mile wide.

"YES! Damn it, yes!" Henderson stormed out of the room. Alec whooped in joy, Carlin and Ford did high fives, Gay and Nina embraced each other, the others just grinned.

"All right, all right, that's enough! If I ever heard a fool idea, why I ought to.." Straker muttered. "My first command is for all of you to get back to work! NOW!"

There was a chorus of timid "Yes, sirs." They turned to go.

"Wait," Ed said. They turned around expectantly. Ed paused.

"Thank you. Thank you all," Ed said softly, emotionally.

They smiled.

"Now get out of here and get to work!" Ed repeated with a slight grin.

"I will file my recommendation that you take medical leave, Commander. You also have a lot of personal R & R time that can be added to it. To sum it up, you can take as much leave as you deem necessary. Your job is secure," Jackson said.

They all filed out of the room. Except for Alec.

"You didn't give me the least warning...Alec E. Freeman, why I ought to..." Ed began angrily.

"Now now, that isn't a nice thing to say to a guy that you would like to have as a brother," Alec said, getting himself a bourbon and drinking half of it in one gulp. He poured some more.

"What.." Ed stammered in shock.

"You heard me, Ed," Alec said, hard.

"How the blazes..?" Ed said nervously.

Alec raised the glass.

"To Commander Edward Straker. One of the finest men who ever lived." Alec emphasized the word live. Ed caught it, smiled warmly, nodded a little.

"Alec..." Their eyes met, they spoke volumes about things strangely left unsaid.

"Forget it. Come on. Mags is so going to put your skinny ass in hospital." Alec swallowed the rest of his drink.

Ed moaned loudly.

"A what?" Ed Straker said from his wheelchair. He was hooked up to the usual IV's , and had drains attached to the incisions in his shoulder underneath his gown. Mags had passed a guard to come into his private room. He seemed to have more security attached to him than the prime minister. Odd, even if he was a famous movie guy. He'd been quietly reading a new Rodgers suspense novel when she had come in. Now he set down the paperback and removed his bifocals. He still felt hot. It was really beginning to bug him.

"A TENS unit. Transcutaneous Electrode Nerve Stimulator. You can use it to relieve your pain." Mags passed the small black gadget with its electrodes over to Ed. Ed furrowed his forehead.

"Looks like a transistor radio. Can I get jazz channels on it?" Ed wondered.

"Quit screwing around, Straker, that little gizmo creates endorphins in the body which help stop the pain." she grinned. Mags wondered if Ed even had noticed that she'd actually put on a silk dress and hosiery and stuck her feet into heels to make her look attractive for him. Okay, so, she had done it to make her look attractive for him. Boy, how low a person can sink in a matter of days, moped Mags. I'm totally sucking up to this guy, and he's sitting there like a rock. He turns his libido on and off like a light switch. Damn. "How are you feeling, anyway? You look like you got some of your color back." Mags lied. He actually looked whiter than the sheets. The important thing was, most of his awful despair was gone, and he was being taken care of.

Ed looked at her thoughtfully. It was the first time he'd seen her in a actual dress, instead of the plain cotton top, jeans, lab coat and clogs she'd worn before. It wasn't doing wonders for his pulse, since that brief and frenzied mutual groping had given him a pretty good idea of what lie under that dress. That afternoon, Alec had brought Ed a vanilla milkshake and fish and chips, (most of which Alec had eaten while Ed polished off the milkshake) plus the full G-6 and dossier on Mags. Ed had not been all that surprised to find out Margaret's mother had been an Asian seamstress, while her father had been a British racehorse owner. He had, however, been very sad to find out Margaret's mother had killed herself after they'd divorced, and her small tailoring shop had gone under. Margaret had been raised in an Catholic orphanage in San Francisco, where she and her mother had relocated after the divorce. Since no one wanted to adopt a ten year old half-Asian, half-British girl with a bad attitude and a mouth like a sailor on leave, Margaret had grown up there, until she had left, worked her way through college and gotten her Masters in psychiatry. Ed had asked Alec to find out more about Mags' father. The bottom line was, Margaret Fielding was not a security risk. Ed tried not to think about how relieved he was about it. He also tried not to think about her marching down the aisle of Angel's church to be his bride in Lily's place. It was ridiculous. Wasn't it?

Of course it was.

Then why was he imagining what Maggie would look like with a wedding veil attached to a pearl and diamond tiara? Why was he thinking of slipping a solid gold band on her finger? Saying I do?

Ed sighed to himself. You're a lonely idiot, Straker--

"Tired. They keep doing tests on me, taking samples, making me swallow this and that, guess they're still worried about the infection. I'm fed up with my room, take me for a ride?"

"Tarzan the ape boy out there won't like it if I steal you away, Ed."

"Tarzan has nothing to say about it. I pay Tarzan's salary." Ed smiled a little.

"How fast do you want to go?" Mags said, helping take off the brake and arranging Ed's legs on the foot rest. He was so shockingly thin, it upset her.

"Don't even joke about that." Ed said firmly. She chuckled and pushed him out the door. The young, tall muscular guard looked at Ed uneasily.

"If Freeman finds out about this, Mr. Straker..well, let's put it this way, I need my job."

"I know about worrying about the security of one's job, Carlson. Freeman doesn't need to find out about this. How's your wife and daughter?" Ed asked crisply.

"Fine, Sir, fine, thanks for asking. " the guard smiled.

"Forward, driver." Ed said to Mags.

"I feel the need for speed!" Mags shouted, starting to push the wheelchair.

"Mags, I'm not a young man anymore, don't scare me like this. My days of flying at mach speeds are long over. I'll leave it to Tom Cruise." Ed grinned at her. "Mayland has a garden, I can see it through my window. Seems I never stay here long enough to investigate it. I'd like to see it at ground level, like the aging film magnate I am.."

"Your wish is my command. And cut the horse piss about age. I know twenty year olds that don't have your body, Straker, you wild sexy dog, you."

Ed looked up and gave her a decidedly less than genuine warning look.

Behind them, the guard spoke into the two way radio that was strapped to his shoulder.

"Carlson here. Fielding's moving Straker into the garden area. You better move in, Jay."

"Right. We're standing by. Is that crazy woman still trying to get to him?"

"That's what I heard. And you know what Colonel Freeman said."

"I heard that he personally promised to cut off the nuts of any person who allowed that Marsh female to get within 50 feet of Straker." the other guard said.

Carlson chuckled.

"That would be hard to explain to my wife, and ruin my sex life. Not to mention hurting like hell. Okay, Carlson out."

"I guess coming out here wasn't such a great idea after all. I feel so lousy. Feel hot. " Ed told Mags. His speech was slightly slurred.

"I'll take you back, Ed," Mags assured him, starting to get worried.

"Edward! So that is where you are! I have been looking all over for you!"

Ed stared in the general direction of the voice. Mags turned to see a petite woman with long black hair, dressed in red, with numerous pendants, including a pentagram. She wore a beaded shawl with Celtic symbols on it. Mags instantly knew it must be Lily, and felt downright homely in her presence. But what had she expected? Ed would naturally be attracted to a stunning woman, as gorgeous as he himself was, even in his early fifties.

"Who are you?" Lily demanded, looking at the tall Asian woman with short wispy dark hair, dressed in silk and wearing heels. "One of my Edward's silly starlets?"

"Huh?" Mags said. Right behind Lily came a guard chasing her, yelling at her.

"Maam, Maam, you can't be here, come with me!" he was saying. Lily spun around on him. He actually backed away an inch, as if she posed a dire threat.

"Who do you think you are speaking to, you dreadful little ogre? I am engaged to Edward, you cannot tell me what to do! Edward, have this common little man taken away at once!"

The guard spoke softly into a microphone he had attached to his shoulder. Mags caught the word Freeman. Thank God, Alec would handle this, she thought.

"I'm taking Ed back to his room," Mags said, finally finding her voice, and starting to push Ed's chair. Lily stepped in front of her. It was rather like she was a seed trying to intimidate a large oak tree, which in this case was Mags.

"I will take him to his room. He doesn't need you." Lily announced dramatically.

"Now look here, Miss Marsh--" Mags said, beginning to lose her temper.

"Do not even think of arguing with me, you common little creature. I am a daughter of the Goddess, I am a witch. Don't think for one moment that I wouldn't-"

"Now you listen to me. I don't give a rat's mangy ass what you are! I didn't let a lousy karate sensei toss my butt around in a dojo for a whole year for nothing. I could break you in half before you even knew what was happening. So get the fucking hell out of my way, bitch!" Mags yelled.

Lily Marsh made the all too fatal mistake of not listening. Mags flipped her, effortlessly but hard. Taken by surprise, Lily tumbled into the dirt, shocked that Mags had actually touched her.

"How dare you!" Lily shouted, but stayed right where she was. Suddenly Alec Freeman popped out of nowhere, and yelled at the guard, who was beginning to develop a rather sickly shade of green, watching his job security fade swiftly away. Not to mention the prospect of becoming a eunich.

"You idiot! I gave orders that Ed was not to, oh, come on, Mags, let's get--"

Ed Straker had watched everything without saying a word. He began to laugh. Over and over.

Everybody turned toward him.

"Purple bug. Purple bug on a rug." Ed intoned, and started to laugh again. Then his eyes rolled back in his head and he slumped forward unconscious, and Mags fortunately caught him, or he would have fallen out of his chair. He felt hot to the touch.

"Alec, he's burning up!" Mags said, desperately worried.

"Damn! No time for a stretcher--"

Alec bent, and picked up Ed gently in his arms with no more exertion than he would have picked up a manila folder, and hurried toward the hospital, Mags following behind him after kicking off her high heels, and carrying them.

Lily and the guard looked after them, stunned.

"Septic shock." Alec said gravely. He was in the waiting room with Stanley and Frances Brisby, Mags and Lily. Lily was sitting opposite Mags, not meeting her eyes. All of them looked exhausted. Ed was still in surgery, being operated on.

"How bad is he?" Frances asked, wringing her long, perfectly manicured fingers.

"Bad enough, sugarplum." Stanley said, in an ominous tone. "I've known men who were wounded in battle die of it."

"Sepsis. Bacterial infection in the blood. How were we supposed to know that Ed was allergic to some damn trace metal in the pins they used to fuse his shoulder together after he was shot by that bastard Rutland? Now bacteria is running rampant through his system," Alec said. "Sepsis. Full of pus, his incisions were. He was already in deliruim, that's what the laughing was about, seeing things. And the pain, the pain he was complaining about. Just another symptom of the sepsis. Idiot signed himself out of here too damn early after being shot. I don't know why I bother to try and help him. Bloody minded as a mule."

Mags' dark eyes widened at the word 'shot', how many film executives got in that kind of trouble? I bet I was right, right when I saw all those scars, bet he is some general or something, top secret mission, can't talk about it.

Oh Ed. Please live.

"He had an infection when they brought him into the hospital where I work, and they were able to help him then. He'll be okay, won't he, Alec? Won't he?" Mags said plaintively. She bit her lip.

"I don't know," Alec said grimly. "I've never seen an individual with the sheer disregard Ed seems to have for his own skin."

"Edward will live," Lily said in a far away tone. They turned to look at her. "I know he will live." Lily nodded half to herself, and then looked at Mags in an odd fashion. She sighed. Mags stared at her, uneasy, maybe Alec had been right, maybe she did have some sort of power. The business about the wishing fairy saving Ed's life had seemed too bizarre to even think about. But the eerie look on Lily's face, as if she was seeing something beyond what human eyes could see... Mags shivered, hoping Lily didn't notice.

Lily stood up.

"I will come back, when he is well." she declared.

"Running out on him again, are you, Lily Marsh?" Angel accused in a cold tone.

"Stanley." Frances said softly, taking her husband's hand.

"I am not the one. I should have seen it. I am not the one," Lily intoned, seemingly not bothered by Angel's uncharacteristic accusation. She gathered her shawl around her, and walked away.

"Fine, just what he needs, her walking off on him when he's so sick. Doesn't that broad have a brain in her head?" Mags exclaimed in frustration.

"No, and I'm the one who orchestrated them getting together. What an idiot I am. I should have known someone as independent and as strange as she is wouldn't make Ed a good wife. Shit, she didn't even take good care of herself when she was carrying his baby. I'm to blame for Ed's misery, and for his being so ill. Why in hell didn't I make sure he didn't leave hospital? No, I trusted his judgement, I gave in. If Ed dies--"

"Alec, Ed is Ed, there's nothing you could have done. Don't blame yourself, it accomplishes nothing. Believe me, you could be with Ed everyday and he'd still be Ed. I know what I'm talking about. I'm a psychiatrist, remember?"

Alec sighed, nodded at Mags. Mags turned to Angel.

"Reverend, I'm not particularily religious, and I'm not Anglican but I'd like it if you said a prayer for Ed's recovery."

Angel smiled at her.

"I have been, child. Believe me, I have been. I am sure that Edward is one of God's special children. After coming so close to losing him, I know that the Lord will not take him now, I feel sure that Edward still has work to do on this earth. And although I'm loathe to admit it, Lily has been reliable about what she sees and senses in the past. If she says Edward will live, then he will."

"I'm going to go get us some coffee and something to eat. I'll be right back." Mags said.

"Need any help, dear?" Frances said gently.

Mags smiled. "No, I'm fine." She walked out of the waiting room.

"She loves our Edward. She just doesn't know it yet." Frances said.

"Now, now, sugarplum--" Angel began with a grin.

"Oh you hush, you spotted it before I did, really."

"What the devil are you both talking about?" Alec asked.

"Haven't you noticed the way she looks at him? Or listened to the loving way he says her name? I haven't seen two people that smitten with each other since--well, since Angel and I married." Frances smiled.

"We don't even know if Ed's going to make it, and you two are matchmaking?" Alec was amused in spite of himself. "Okay, I must admit I have wondered about the way she plunged into this whole mess. She denies it, you know. I think the expression was horse piss."

"I mentioned to Edward in private that it would be a pity if he didn't wear that morning coat he had tailored for him." Angel grinned.

"Angel!" Frances tittered. "What did he say?"

"Thought I'd gone balmy. But I think the idea appealed to him, he just wouldn't admit it to himself. And we've seen how Mags is acting."

"I just hope he recovers enough to handle whatever is in store for him. I don't think he's in any shape to get involved with any woman right now." Alec said. "Not even one of the stuff Margaret Fielding's made out of. She has quite a past, you know. Anyone in contact with Ed for long, it's customary to have our studio security run a check on them. So I was given an extensive dossier on her. You two ever hear of Sir Adam Fielding?"

"Sure. Terrific British horseman. Supposed to be running one of his horses, Peony, in the Thomas Pink Gold Cup at Cheltenham this season. Was a jockey, but had a bad spill and changed round to owning and training horses instead. Heard he married, but his wife had some tragic accident or something. Very hushed up in the press," Angel said. "Won several trophies at Cheltenham. Why? Is he related to Mags?"

"Her father. He married her Japanese mother Miyako, only after he got her pregnant. They never got along all that well, and they eventually divorced when Mags was small. Miyako refused any help, and eventually relocated to San Francisco with Margaret was about eight years old. When the small tailor shop she'd started had to be closed because of financial problems, Miyako killed herself, leaving Mags alone to fend for herself. She grew up in a Catholic orphanage."

"Poor little thing," Frances sighed.

"Ed says he thinks she came to England to see her father, to try and establish some connection with him. He says he doesn't believe she came back to England to practice just for the hell of it." Alec said. "At any rate, he asked me privately to find out what I could about Sir Adam Fielding."

"If we can do anything to help, let us know, Alec." Frances said.

"I wonder what's keeping her?" Angel said.

Mags looked at her wristwatch. Almost four hours, and no word on Ed. She just couldn't stand it anymore, she couldn't stand it, and she ducked into a deserted corridor, and burst into tears. Horse piss! This is ridiculous! I only have known Ed for what? A day? A few hours? And I'm ankle deep in trouble, behaving like a love stricken schoolgirl instead of the rational psychiatrist in her late forties that I am! He doesn't need me to muck things up anymore than they are already. I have to just back out of this before I screw up everything I've ever worked for. Yes. Of course. I don't need to get more involved with him. I'll assign someone to him, yes, of course.

But what if he dies, Mags? What if that screwy witch woman isn't right, and he dies?

Broken hearted was only an expression, wasn't it?

Oh face it, Mags girl, if he dies, a part of you that you never knew was there will die with him. Damn you, Ed! Live! Live! Live and make up with that strange woman. Marry her like you planned. Just live! It doesn't matter that I love you. Just live.

Mags paused in shock.

I love you?

Horse piss! This isn't fair! I don't want to love you, Ed Straker! Damn damn damn! Look at what happened to my parents! It was supposed to be a beautiful love story, Ed! Only my father only got married because he'd gotten my mother pregnant and my mother got divorced, then she blew her head off with my father's gun when her dreams never came true. That's reality, Ed! I don't want to be in love! I don't want to-

Mags sobbed aloud, then whacked the wall several times. A nurse appeared out of nowhere and stared at her. Mags said a heartfelt FUCK underneath her breath and moved roughly past the shocked nurse, toward the cafeteria for food and coffees.

The ceiling was dirty. And he was freezing cold. And he wasn't quite sure where he was. And his throat burned like hell. No, wait, the ceiling wasn't dirty, it was discoloured. Yes, yes. Better way to put it. Good old ICU. Mayland Hospital. Nothing like it. Yes, the familiar beep beep beep of the cardiac monitor. Okay, try to think, Straker. What the blazes happened? I must be alive, I think, therefore I am.

"---Water--" he heard a weak voice mutter. Oh. That was him. God , he sounded half dead.

"Ah, awake are you, Commander? Just a moment now, I'll get you some water, no, no, don't try to sit up, you'll pull out your IV's."

The ceiling suddenly became three ceilings. Three discolored ceilings.

"Dizzy." Ed said. If he kept at it long enough, he might actually form a sentence with more than one word in it, he reasoned.

"You woke up a little sooner than we figured. Don't worry, the dizziness will pass. Nothing to worry about. Here you go. Some nice fresh water for you." the nurse said cheerfully.

Any minute now and she'll toss me a doggy biscuit or something, Ed thought. Smug old fuddy duddy. Soon as I get out of here, I'm firing her. First I have to remember what her name is. Name, name, she must have a name..

He managed to sip some of the water, and it was wonderful. Something out of his range of sight buzzed. Phone, he thought.

"Yes, Doctor, all vital signs are fine. Why yes, I don't see why not, and heaven knows we wouldn't be able to stop Colonel Freeman even if we wanted to. Yes, I understand, I'll tell the Commander." she laughed.

Ed looked at her. Knew too much, he thought. Would have to give her the amnesia shot. Maybe later. After he drank about a gallon of the water. No, two gallons. No, wait, Mayland is ours. Your brain's still a little fuzzy, Straker.

"Having trouble remembering," Ed said. Wow! Three words! Soon he could pass his A levels or something. Or maybe head a secret organisation that fought off the alien threat to Earth. Or maybe paint the ceiling. Fresh coat of paint.

"It will come back to you, Commander. Colonel Freeman's on his way here with a couple of civilians."

"Don't tell me, let me guess. Stanley and Frances Brisby, Lily Marsh and Dr. Margaret Fielding?" Ed sipped a little more of the water, as his memory and speech became clearer. There was something about a snug bug on a rug..no, don't even go there, Straker.

"Lily Marsh isn't with them." The elderly nurse's tone was dismissing and disapproving.

Damn. Gossip spreads faster around here than most of the UFO's I spend my life chasing. I'll bet she knows we were engaged and we broke up. I'll bet she knows if I prefer briefs to boxers. I bet she knows where my mole--uh Straker, don't go there--

"Am I okay? What happened to me?"

"Sepsis due to infected incisions, and a severe allergic reaction to a trace metal that the pins in your reconstructed shoulder were partially made of. Your shoulder had to be refused with a metal you aren't allergic to, and you had to have massive antibotic treatment. The septic shock alone was causing a lot of your symptoms. Fever, pain, delirium."

"I see. Who do I sue?" Ed inquired eagerly.

She grinned at him.

"Commander, something tells me that you're making one of your legendary miraculous recoveries."

"I hope you're right." Ed said.

"I'm counting on it, Nurse Swan, because as soon as he is completely recovered, I'm going to kill him for making us all worry about him," a familar Australian voice threatened.

"Threatening to murder one's superior officer is a court martial offense, Colonel Freeman," Ed said with amusement, and relief at seeing the craggy, pockmarked face he knew so well.

"You're too weak to press charges," Alec cackled.

"You have a point there. How's Stanley and Frances and Maggie?"

"Waiting outside. I thought I'd come in alone and see how you were, find out if you felt up to visitors."

"I'm all right. I'll be all right, Alec."

"I guess I have to admit, I'm grateful to see that repulsive face of yours again. If you had actually died, I would have had to buy a new suit or something," Alec commented.

"You mean you actually have money left over to buy a suit after your expenses from paying every last trollop in Southern England?" Ed sounded genuinely shocked.

"They pay me, Ed. I have to have some way to earn decent money rather than working for what little you cough up on payday."

"I bet you overcharge them, too. All those innocent women. Shame on you, Colonel."

"At least I know what to do with all those innocent women, Ed. You'd probably need a manual and a magnifying glass."

"That's a cruel thing to say. Frances loves me. She feeds me lemon and banana nut muffins."

"Frances just takes pity on you. She feeds stray dogs too. Only difference is you haven't developed fleas. Yet."

The SHADO nurse was listening to this with glee.

"Just how long have you two known each other?" she grinned.

"Too long." Alec said in disgust.

"Way way, too long. Matter of fact, I don't think I want you to work for me anymore. You're sacked." Ed said thoughtfully. He sipped more of his water through the straw, eyes sparkling.

"Thank God, Commander. You were really getting to be a nasty pain in the arse."

"Me? Have you ever seen the bill I get for all the liquor you consume in my office?"

"What did you expect me to do with your cheap dispenser scotch? Use it to paint the studio sets? Just because you're not man enough to drink an elephant under a public house table doesn't mean I have to respond in kind."

"There wasn't any elephant under the table until you were on the fifteenth tumbler of Glenlivet, Colonel." Ed grinned. He finished his water, and gave the cup to the nurse. Alec grinned back. The nurse chuckled, refilled Ed's glass from a stainless steel jug and set it on a portable table beside him and excused herself from the room.

"Glad you're okay, Ed. I'll deny this if you ever repeat it, but I like having you around."

"Same here, Australian. Same terms."

Ed carefully reached out a hand that had an IV in it, and gestured for Alec to come closer. Alec did, and the two men exchanged a gentle squeeze of the hand. They looked in each other's eyes, pledging loyality to each other, respecting and caring for each other without any need of words. A friendship that had lasted an eternity, a deep affection between two very different men that broadened their unique masculinity rather than diminished it.

"All right, Colonel. Bring Mohammed to the mountain." Ed smiled, and let go. Alec nodded, and went out. Within a minute, Stanley and Frances came in, followed by Mags. Alec collected some chairs for them.

"So, Q-tip. Beat the odds again, did you, son?" Angel grinned, patted Ed's leg.

"Good karma, I guess."

"Oh you poor thing! You're so thin!" Frances exclaimed.

"When I get out of here, you can bake me some of those wonderful lemon muffins." Ed said.

"Why doesn't she ever bake me some of those muffins?" whined Alec.

"Oh now, dear, Edward needs them more than you do." Frances patted Alec's hand. Ed gave Alec a smug look, and Alec rolled his eyes.

"Frances, could you get me some more water?"

"Of course, Edward." Frances poured Ed some water, and handed it to him with his straw.

"If I'm not going to be fed, I'm leaving. See you this evening, Ed. And oh, Ed? Don't even think about getting out of here early." Alec grinned. Ed's smug look vanished, and he groaned. Alec patted Mags on the back affectionately, and left. Mags stared after him, then looked back at Ed wistfully. She arranged herself at the foot of his bed, stared at his IV's. Ed sipped his water, watching her curiously.

"That's got to hurt, Straker."

"Very observant of you, Maggie. Listen, Maggie, I have this vague memory of Lily showing up, and knowing Lily as I do, I'm sure she didn't have any flattering things to say about you. So I want to apol-"

"Are you nuts, Ed? She got in my way. I expressed my displeasure of her blocking my way. "

"She can be-"

"I hear Mags flipped her," Angel said innocently. There was more than a little admiration in the Reverend's tone. He grinned openly at Mags and she winked at him.

"Wha-?" Ed said.

"I studied judo and karate in a San Francisco dojo for one year. I have the bruises on my ass to prove it." Mags shrugged.

"Wait. Let me get this straight. Lily blocked your way, and you tossed her?"

"You were very sick, Straker, you started quoting something that sounded like quasi Dr. Suess. So you're damn right I flipped Miss I-am-the-daughter-of-the-fucking-Goddess. And finally Alec picked you up and took you to the ER. They rushed you into surgery and saved your butt. So yeah, I flipped your precious Lily. "

Ed's mouth pulled into a straight line, then it curved, then he began laughing uproariously, then he put his hand to his throat, wincing.

"Damn! Hurts to laugh."

Frances and Angel grinned.

"Have some more ice water, dear," Frances said.

"You know what, sugarplum, I think we should go home and have dinner, while Mags explains everything that happened," Angel said meaningfully.

"You just got here," Ed said.

"Oh, son, you're in good hands. We'll be by to see you in the morning." Angel hugged Ed gently and Frances kissed Ed on the cheek.

"Bring me some lemon muffins," Ed chuckled.

They laughed, waved, and were gone.

"I should go too," Mags shrugged.

"Do you have to?" complained Ed. "I hate being by myself in these-uh-okay. I'll see-"

"Do you want me to stay?"

"Yes."

"Are you pissed at me for slugging your fiancée?" Mags smiled.

Ed sighed.

"She isn't my fiancée. I don't think she handles the fiancée role well, I think she's too much of an independent soul." Ed shrugged, sipped his water. Mags took a long, deep breath.

"Ed?"

"Hmmm?"

"I love you."

The water glass slipped out of Ed's hand, drenched him and smashed rather noisily on the floor, and the cardiac monitor did a strange beep. Which brought a nurse rather hastily in.

"Mr. Straker? Are you in distress? Oh, broke a glass? Don't worry, and oh my, you've gotten yourself all wet, well, let's get you into a new gown and make sure your incision didn't get dampened. I need to check your vitals again anyway. Miss Fielding, would you mind leaving for a moment?"

Mags rose up.

"I'll be back, Ed."

"Maggie-"

He watched her slip away quietly, without looking back.

Mags went into the women's lavatory, checked to see if anyone was present, then broke into sobs. She splashed cold water on her face, steadied herself.

"Horse piss!" she declared aloud. She sighed. "Real professional, Mags girl. Real professional to just blurt it out like that after the guy's had an operation, and doesn't need anymore damn emotional crap to upset him. Fuck! I need a drink." She stumbled out of the lavatory, nearly bumping into a pair of interns that stared after her in a puzzled manner.

"Lieutenant Winslow--" Alec started to say to the sweating Shado operative in front of Straker's desk. Colonel Lake leaned against Alec's chair, and listened without expression.

"Colonel, please, I just couldn't stop that dame, she went flying past me like-well-a UFO, I swear it, if she had been a real threat to Commander Straker--"

"Look, you moronic clown, she WAS a real threat to Commander Straker, and if I wasn't in such a damn good mood because the Commander is going to live, I would cut off your balls with a dull razor. So you better count your blessings and get out of my sight before I change my mind. And Winslow, you're on report, you better believe this incident is going down on your record. Now get out of here!"

"Sir. Yes, Sir!" The befuddled guard practically ran out of Straker's office with his gentials still intact. Virginia Lake looked at Alec in a cool manner.

Alec was grumbling to himself and enjoying it. He looked at Virginia.

"What? Did I insult your delicate feminine sensibilities?" Alec barely hid a grin.

"I would have cut off his willie and his balls, but you're in charge, Colonel," Virginia said softly, and sauntered in a ladylike fashion out of Straker's office.

Alec guffawed loudly for a full two minutes, and then poured himself a drink from Ed's dispenser. He raised it into the air.

"Here's to you, Ed."

Alec swallowed the Glenlivet in two gulps and then went back to work.

Mags swallowed down a fish dinner in the Mayland cafeteria without much appetite, and then flushed it down with a cold cup of coffee. She then headed for the ICU. Ed's bed was empty, and made up. She blinked. Her pulse raced. She went to the main desk.

"Where's Mr. Straker?" she shouted, frantic.

The on duty nurse looked down her nose at Mags' badge.

"This is a intensive care unit, Dr. Fielding, please keep your voice down. Mr. Straker requested, and was deemed stable enough to be moved into his regular private room. Just go through the doors, turn right and it's room A-1."

Mags sagged with relief. Half way to the door she thought, his regular private room? What is it with Ed? Does he own this place? What have I gotten myself into? Well, in for a penny, in for a pound. I've fallen in love with some international secret agent or something. I've got to find out more about him from Stanley..

Mags went to room A-1. A huge Jamaican in a guard's uniform beamed at her as she came up.

"You be Dr. Fielding. You be a pretty sight. Go on in, Mistah Straker's expectin' you."

Mags couldn't help but be charmed, and she thanked him, pushed open the door and stepped inside.

And stared. It wasn't like stepping inside a dull, cookie cutter, hospital room. It was more like stepping into one of San Francisco's grandest hotel suites.

Ed was quietly watching a large screen colour television, and picking at a tray in front of him that had food on it. He was sitting upright in a high tech hospital bed, with what looked like a down comforter covering him. One IV remained in his wrist. He brightened as Mags entered. On a table next to him were several floral arrangements and a few mylar balloons, all with a cheerful get well motif. The room was painted a warm blue, with ivory trim. On the walls were several paintings, some abstract, some landscapes. A silver mobile in a corner rotated slowly from the breeze Mags had created by opening the door. There was a large window with a lace curtain, the shade pulled down.

"I wondered what happened to you. Come sit with me. There's something I want you to see."

"Ed, what I said to you.." Mags began, sitting next to Ed on the bed. Ed pointed to the screen and she looked without interest.

Dr. Margaret Fielding froze.

On the screen, seated in front of the well known journalist Barbra Walters, was a impeccably tailored, balding man with a mustache. Talking about thoroughbred horses.

"Your father is quite an interesting man." Ed said. "That's a recent videotape Alec managed to procure for me from the States. Maybe someday you and I can meet him."

"How the fuck did you find out about my father? What else do you know? Damn it, Straker! Who the hell ARE you?" Mags exploded.

"Just a accident prone guy that wants to help a person he really cares for discover her father. Which is probably why she came all the way out here from San Francisco to do, only she never quite got around to it. Maggie, the movie business can be dangerous sometimes, if I'm around someone for any reasonable length of time, Alec has a security firm check into their backgrounds for me. So I know quite a bit about you. Even the dojo business." Ed chuckled.

"Fuck you, Ed Straker! You know everything there is to know about me and I don't know even the slightest thing about you, and already I'm in love with you. I suppose you know what happened to my mother? I don't want your pity, Straker!" Mags leaned against him moodily.

Ed looked at her with a gentle smile. He used the remote to turn off the television.

"Grieving is a perfectly healthy and natural reaction to loss. Now where could I have possibly heard that?"

"You're disgusting, Straker. You're disgusting, and I'm walking out that door and I'm running like hell to Heathrow, and I'm taking the first fucking flight back to the States, and back to San Francisco, and I'm never , ever, going to think about you ever."

"I'd be lonely. I'd be so agonizingly lonely, Doctor. I'd be thinking about chilly nights and the front lawn outside my flat, and my favourite silk dressing gown with the grass stains and an idiot who almost turned his back on the people he most cared about in the world. But, hey, if you insist, go." Ed sighed dramatically.

"I hate you, Ed. I despise you, Ed. You make me sick, Ed."

"Pity."

"Oh shut up."

Mags snuggled against him.

"Maggie."

"Hmmm?"

"I love you, Maggie."

Mags sat back and stared at him. He looked at her lovingly, eyes serene.

"Edward Straker, if you're fucking bullshitting me, I'll pick you up and throw your skinny ass out that damn window." Mags' heart was beating fast. It was in his face, in those frosty blue eyes. He wasn't just saying something she wanted to hear. He loved her. She loved him. It was really happening. He loved her. Ed Straker had just admitted he loved her.

"It's eight floors down, Maggie.. I'd probably die," Ed said thoughtfully, eyeing the window.

"Good." I will not cry. Mags girl, you will not cry.

"Were you born without the compassion gene, or was it surgically removed?"

"Shut up Straker!" She burst into tears.

"Oh Maggie. Oh my Maggie, come here. Let me hold you. Let me hold you," Ed said softly. She went into his arms. For a long moment she cried, feeling the warmth of him, feeling his warm breath against her cheek, touching the silkiness of his hair, smelling the faint odor of the surgical cleanser they'd used to prepare him for the violation of his frail, thin body, taking it in as if it was the most wonderful cologne in the world. She was all his and he was all hers. It was a dream, it had to be a dream. She kissed him gently and he buried his face contentedly in her hair after planting several soft, light kisses on her forehead, on her cheek, on her lips, on her neck. He wiped away her tears with a firm but a gentle touch.

"Oh horse piss, but I love you," she said after they just sat there in one another's arms for several minutes.

He held her at arm's length.

"Horse piss. Gosh, nobody ever said anything as romantic as horse piss to me before." Ed grinned.

"Oh be quiet. And you better not even think of trying to get that skinny ass out of here early before you're all well. If I have to handcuff you to this bed--"

"Hmm, the dossier on you didn't say anything about a preference for sadomaschistic practices--I may have to reread it."

"Shut up, you gorgeous, lovely man you."

"Yes maam, whatever you say, Maam."

"Ed?"

"Yes?" Ed smiled at her.

She took his hand without the IV in it and held it tightly, trembled a little, looked in his eyes solemnly.

"What is it, Maggie?" Ed said, a little concerned now.

"Ed. Edward. I love you. I want to love and look after you for the rest of my life, the way you deserve to be looked after. I want to make up for all the pain and suffering I saw in your face the first day I ever looked at you. I've seen the unhappiness in you, the longing to be cherished and cared for-"

"Maggie," Ed said softly, overcome.

"No, hush. You're so precious, Ed, you're so special. I love you, I want to make you happy. Will you marry me, Edward Straker? Will you?" She reached up and stroked one of his cheeks.

Ed looked absolutely stunned. A tear fell silently down his cheek.

"I'm a difficult man to be a wife to, Maggie. You don't know everything there is to know about me. There will be hard times ahead. Things won't always be as perfect as they are right this moment. My work is more important to me than I ever can say, there may be long periods of being alone, being away from each other."

"Ed, listen, I wasn't born yesterday. I don't know what you really do. I have the sense that it's very important and that it's dangerous, and I won't lie and say that I'm not scared. But if it's important to you, it's important to me. I don't have to know what it is. I just know you didn't get all those scars by walking into a studio door. Whatever lies ahead, we'll get through it. I'm stronger than you think. So, will you marry me?"

"Yes. Yes. Yes, Margaret Fielding, yes. I will mar-"

"For Christ's sake Ed, you just got out of surgery, do you have to grope the poor woman already?"

Mags and Ed sagged. Ed managed a grin.

"Alec, have I ever told you you have the absolute worse sense of timing I have ever known any man to have?"

"What a way to thank me for the flowers and balloons I sent. They weren't free, you know." Alec grinned. Mags just stared at him. "What's with the lady psychiatrist?"

"The lady psychiatrist just proposed marriage to me. I accepted."

"Heh heh heh, that's a good one, Ed."

"Alec? Alec, I'm not kidding. Alec, I need you to tackle the paperwork so that Maggie and I can march down the aisle of Angel's church. Maggie, can you pour me some of that coffee? Light and sweet, please."

"You're-you're-you're not kidding. You're not kidding."

"I'm not kidding. And I have a lot of work ahead of me to get this thing handled fast so that we can get married."

"Oh no, Ed, the first thing you do is get well. You're not going anywhere until the doctors say you can. You may have been able to sweettalk your way out of the hospital before, but not while I'm around," Mags announced. She poured coffee for Ed and herself.

"Can I reconsider this marriage business?" Ed grinned.

Alec started to whoop. And then he stormed out the door.

"What the horse piss is wrong with him?" giggled Mags. Ed took a sip of the coffee.

"Well, if I know Alec, he's going to drive out to Stanley and Frances' home and tell them the good news, and then shortly after that, thanks to his big Australian mouth, gossip will spread like-"

The tall Jamaican stuck his head in the door.

"Congratulations there, Mistah Straker, you got there a fine pretty bride."

The doors shut.

Ed moaned loudly while Mags collapsed in laughter.

(one month later)

"You did what?"

The delivery man that handed Ed yet another receipt to sign looked at him like he'd lost his mind. He didn't see Mags behind Ed, or hear what she'd just casually told him. "Uh sorry, yes, thanks." Ed handed the man a tip and closed the door.

"You just got out of the hospital, quit yelling like a --what is it Angel calls it? A bunyip? Ed the bunyip. I said, you knew I quit my job at Langley Porter in Frisco, but I gave notice at Cullenbart, too. So you're stuck with me, Handsome. Unemployed psychiatrist. Until I find a part time job here somewhere. It doesn't matter. I just want to be your wife, I want to be Mrs. Straker for a while before I start thinking about working again. You can afford me, can't you?" Mags grinned.

"You have a career, Maggie, a career that was damned important to you. Are you sure just being a wife is going to be enough for you? I don't want to think that I've taken you away from anything you love. And quit calling me a bunyip." Ed grinned. "And of course I can afford you, silly. Hmm that reminds me, where did I put it?" Ed stepped over the boxes of Mags' belongings which had been coming to the flat ever since Mags had agreed to move in with him. "My flat is beginning to look like a obstacle course," Ed groaned. "First it was bringing home all Alec's balloons and everyone's floral arrangements, until I finally had everything sent to the children's hospital. Then your stuff started to come. And come. And come. I'll going to have to build an annex for your books alone. Don't you ever throw anything out or get rid of anything?"

"Get rid of anything? You blaspheme, Sir! I am a pack rat with credentials. Ed, what in the horse piss are you looking for?" Mags asked, enjoying his discomfort.

"My coat, where did I put it?"

"You still have it on, Ed," Mags laughed.

"I what? Oh. Yes, yes. I knew that." Ed dug in his coat pocket for something.

"Now what did you lose?" Mags stepped over a large crate from San Francisco marked FRAGILE and cuddled up to Ed happily.

"Your engagement ring. Damn! Where did I put it? Oh wait, found it, inside pocket. Come here, bride to be. I may have to attach a tracer to this thing to find you in all this mess." Ed handed her a small black box. Mags whooped excitedly and grabbed it.

"How did you get this without me knowing?"

"You had to go to the loo sometime. And Alec was good enough to go buy it for me, and Frances was good enough to coax you into revealing your ring size." smiled Ed.

"Oh, Ed, oh I wondered why she was-Ohhhhh Myyyyy Goddddddd." Mags stared at the ring on the velvet cushion. It was a one carat pear shaped diamond in a platinum and gold setting from Gerrards. Ed had surprisingly gotten back the ring he had made for Lily in the mail, with a note from Lily wishing him and Margaret a lot of happiness. Alec had returned it for him, and both men had agreed that Lily would probably be back on the horizon in some way or another.

"What's wrong, Maggie, don't you like it?" Ed sounded a bit hurt.

"My God, Ed it looks like a boulder, not a ring. I'm going to be afraid to walk the streets for fear someone will mug me!"

"I'll assign that Jamaican guard to accompany you." chuckled Ed. "Here, let me put it on you. Uh I think I have a couch around here somewhere, at least I did before they delivered all your junk. Oh oh, now, don't cry on me, I can't stand it when you cry on me."

"I can't help it, I'm so happy, all this is like a dream." They sat on Ed's white couch while Ed slipped the exquisite ring on Mags' finger.

"There you go, Mrs. Straker to be. We'll pick out matching wedding bands later. Speaking of the wedding, you don't know how many times I've gotten yelled at by my tailor for first canceling the morning coat, and then telling him I needed it after all, and then losing weight so that he had to change the measurements again." chuckled Ed. He played absentmindedly with the wisps of her hair as she moved her hand to let the stone catch the light.

"Was that the little bald headed guy with the measuring tape around his neck who was muttering to himself that passed me that day I was coming in?" laughed Mags.

"That was him, all right. I'm going to put him into an early grave, poor fellow. I had him come to my hospital room to do some last minute changes. Actually I could always wear dress uniform to marry you in, but Frances said I would look fabulous in a morning coat. I never argue with a woman who makes muffins the way she does."

"She's promised to teach me all her recipes, too!"

"Good. She and Angel can go whisk you off to the stores and help you pick out a wedding gown and some trousseau outfits. A honeymoon in San Francisco sounds pretty good to me. Anything sounds pretty good to me now that I'm finally discharged from hospital. I was at the point where, if one more nurse drew more blood to check my white cell count again, I was going to scream." Ed sighed.

Mags chuckled at him. She leaned, and kissed him.

"My poor bunyip. What is a bunyip, anyway?"

"Some sort of Australian beastie. Incidentally, what are you going to wear tonight?" Ed looked at Mags' blue cotton camp shirt and her faded jeans and blue clogs. Ed slid his arm around her waist contentedly.

"Tonight? What do you mean tonight?"

"Alec's throwing us a little dinner party tonight. Don't you remember? Sort of a combination out of hospital -pre-wedding bash. Stanley and Frances are going to be there, and some people who work for my studio, staff, personnel. Now, don't panic, it's casual." Ed watched Mags jump up and frantically search through the boxes and her luggage. He broke into a grin. "Where's that nice frock you were wearing before? The silk one?"

"I packed it! I don't know where it is! Oh quit laughing Ed Straker, it isn't funny!"

"Calm down, get on the phone and ask Frances to lend you something. Maggie, know what?"

"Where's my handbag? Where's my address book? Horse piss! I can't find anything!"

"I love you Maggie Fielding."

Ed got off the couch, picked up the phone, dialed.

Maggie looked around in desperation for Ed, as Alec came up to her for the fourth time with a fresh bottle of champagne. Little dinner party, my ass, she thought. Alec had made use of one of Harlington-Straker Studios' larger sets, there were at least four tables of catered foods and beverages laid out buffet style, a three piece jazz quartet was playing some song she didn't recognize, that Jamaican whose name she had already forgotten was shoving his video camera in everyone's face, and everyone was talking at once. Guards seemed to be everywhere. And if Alec didn't quit filling her glass, she swore she was going to punch him in the nose.

"Drink up, it's a celebration!" Alec said, popping the cork impressively and pouring the bubbly liquid into her glass. Again.

"Alec, where's Ed, I lost him like three minutes after we came in. No waittttt, don't go, Alec! Oh horse piss! Oh thank God, Frances, a face I recognize. Do you see my husband to-be anywhere?"

"You poor thing. I expect you'll have to get used to Alec's idea of small intimate parties. And learn to share Edward with his people. I passed him over at the salads buffet, he was trying to finally eat something and talk to Mr. Ford and Mr. Ford's girlfriend at the same time. Hold on to me, I'll take you there." Frances smiled. "And may I say, that lace dress I managed to find for you looks lovely, and all I needed to do was take the hem down a bit."

"You're such a life saver, Frances!" Mags hugged Frances and Frances laughed delightfully, led her to Ed.

"Ah, there you are, Maggie. Hiya Frances. Maggie, may I introduce Mr. Keith Ford, and his companion Julie Ward ? This is my fiancee, Dr. Margaret Fielding." Ed said. He expertly forked a large shrimp off his plate, and bit into it. Frances smiled, and went off to find Angel.

"Very pleased to meet you, Maam. And congratulations again, Sir, we're all very pleased that you're out of hospital." Keith Ford said. "Come on, Julie, I want to introduce you to Mr. Freeman."

"Nice meeting you, Ed!" Julie waved.

"You too, Miss Ward, thank you for coming."

Ford began to lead Julie away, but not until she made a comment which Ed and Mags overheard, even with the din of the conversation around them.

"You didn't tell me your boss was so good looking!" Julie exclaimed. Ed looked after her in mid-bite, swallowed, and chuckled.

"Do I have to fend off all the women that find you attractive, Ed Straker?" Mags grinned, taking his arm.

"It shouldn't be a problem for you, considering what you did to Lily. Sorry about vanishing on you like that, but my people haven't seen me in a while here. Come on, maybe we can sneak out of here while--"

"Mistah Straker! Missy Fielding! Look this way! Smile, mon!" the Jamaican guard with the video camera called.

"I think that guy is taking his new hobby too seriously," Ed grinned. "Not a soul has escaped that bloody camera of his."

"Ed, if I have to smile one more time or shake someone's hand, or have someone I don't know hug me like they're a blood relative.." Mags hissed. Ed laughed at her.

"Come on, let's make a run for it, Maggie. Follow me!"

The two of them weaved in and out of the crowd and finally stepped onto a deserted soundstage. Ed looked around carefully, set his plate down.

"Success!"

"Thank God! Can we go home now?"

Ed grinned.

"It will break Alec's heart if we leave early, but judging from all the champagne he was knocking back this evening, he may not even remember who we are tomorrow!"

Mags giggled. Ed smiled at her lovingly.

"I love you, Dr. Fielding." He kissed her lingeringly.

"I love you Mr. Straker." She returned it, reminding herself that he would not vanish like a soap bubble, and that in a matter of another month, she'd be Mrs. Margaret Fielding.

"Good. You drive, I'm bushed!" Ed admitted, tossing her his car keys from his pocket, and taking her arm.

Mags got a funny look on her face. She twirled the keys.

"Oh oh, what now?"

"I feel the need for speed."

"Not THAT again!" Ed moaned playfully. Mags took his hand and led him out.

(one end but here's an alternative ending.) (g) (just for TWM)

Behind them, concealed in the shadows, a pair of eyes watched them rush away. A pair of eyes that had been watching Ed Straker all evening, and for days before that. Watching, waiting, planning. The woman meant nothing. Straker was important. Straker was everything. How wonderful he had looked, how perfect. So perfect. Flawless. Perfect. The dark prince. Soon, soon. Together soon.

Straker, so perfect.

Too bad he has to die.

The eyes faded away, and back into the crowd.

THE END (but this will be continued, maybe , all depends on whether I write it)

The End

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